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Movie Quotes – Day 315

“Remember us.” As simple an order as a king can give. “Remember why we died.” For he did not wish tribute, nor song, nor monuments nor poems of war and valor. His wish was simple. “Remember us,” he said to me. That was his hope, should any free soul come across that place, in all the countless centuries yet to be. May all our voices whisper to you from the ageless stones, “Go tell the Spartans, passerby, that here by Spartan law, we lie.” — 300

We didn’t ask for parades.  We didn’t do it for free drinks.  We didn’t sell our youth, our health, and our lives for a free meal on Veteran’s Day.  We did it because it needed doing, nothing more, nothing less.  All we ask is that what we did, and what we gave up to do it, be remembered.

News Roundup

  • From the “Sovereign Nation” Department – Canada is taking heat from the World Health Organization after Canada put severe restrictions on visas for citizens of countries impacted by the Ebola epidemic in Africa.  Apparently the WHO would prefer for Canada to follow the path our country is going down, which is to take everyone’s temperature at the border, half heartedly try to keep those we deem at risk in quarantine observation, then fold like a cheap suit when they complain about the accomodations.
  • From the “Good Samaritan” Department – The city of Fort Lauderdale in Florida has passed a law making it illegal to feed the homeless in public, and has arrested at least three people for ignoring the law.  I’m as heartless as the next guy, but if someone feels the personal need to help out their fellow man, what business does the state have in stopping them?  Let the good people take care of those who cannot care for themselves, and we just might make this a better place to live.
  • From the “d’Artagnon” Department – Scientists have discovered that some male hummingbirds use their long beaks to stab competitors for mating space in the throat.  The closest I’ve ever come to seeing similar behavior in humans was watching two Russian truck drivers have a knife fight over a prostitute outside of Tver.
  • From the “Till Key” Department – In other animal news, a study of bats has found that some species use their voices to ‘jam’ the echolocation of other bats while hunting insects.   Just goes to show, even in nature, there are jerks.
  • From the “Bwahahahaha!” Department – A man in London became a viral sensation the other day when he revved his Lamborghini so much that it set itself on fire.  He then tried to blow the fire out, and finally gave up and drove away in a flaming huff.  I hope that the gentleman is OK, and that he enjoys the new flame job on his Lambo.
  • From the “Breaking and Entering” Department – A young man in Pennsylvania was arrested yesterday after he broke into a house dressed as a Teletubby.   For those of you without children, Teletubbies was a television show that induced trances in three-year-olds and seizures in 40 year olds.  Personally, I have no idea how I would react to an uninvited yellow Teletubby raiding my fridge, although “Shoot to slide lock” comes to mind.
  • From the “Old School” Department – A 62-year-old warrant officer retired recently, ending the era of draftees in the Army.  The gentleman was drafted in 1972, and has been on active duty ever since.  I’d like to thank him for his over forty years of service.
  • From the “Honor” Department – President Obama presented the Medal of Honor to a relative of a Union officer who gave his life during the Battle of Gettysburg.  Someone had to whisper to the President that the Civil War was when Republicans freed the ancestors of his wife and daughters from slavery.
  • From the “Easy One” Department – The Department of Defense is struggling with what to do about soldiers who use marijuana in states where it has been decriminalized.  Apparently nobody checked the SOP for most units in Europe in the 1990’s.  You see, when a soldier went on leave to the Netherlands, where most drugs are legal, the first thing that the soldier was handed after reporting back to his or her unit was a urinalysis bottle.  If the detector gear burst into flame during analysis of the sample, then the soldier got to enjoy learning the intricacies of the Uniform Code of Military Justice.  There’s nothing keeping the military from telling its employees “We don’t care what’s legal off post.  You’re still not allowed to partake.”.
  • From the “No Kidding” Department – In related news, scientists have discovered that regular, long-term use of marijuana has detrimental effects on the human brain.  You know, even the most ardent advocates of legalization are asserting that smoking pot is good for you, especially when it comes to teenagers.  I guess we had to have scientific confirmation, but was someone really confused as to the fact that potheads tend to not become rocket scientists?
  • From the “Qel Surpris” Department – Conservative news sites are all atwitter about a recent admission by a former Obama administration official that the ACA was passed through deception and obfuscation.  Shocked, yes shocked I am to find that there is skullduggery in the halls of Congress. (Your subsidies, monsieur.)  You mean that a bill, which was written like stereo instructions, complete with annexes about specific bribes carveouts, which were exchanged for votes, taxes, which were hidden for Supreme Court justices to find later, and things that couldn’t be discovered until after the bill was passed, was designed to confuse low information voters and the low information legislators they elect?
  • From the “Bluntskull” Department – A woman in Kentucky has been arrested on drug charges while wearing a tee shirt that reads “I Love Crystal Meth”.  I’d call that “probable cause” right there.  I think the drug war is a waste of time and a threat to liberty, but if you’re this stupid, a few years outside of the breeding pool might just be what you need.
  • From the “Catharsis” Department – A man in Italy recently took a pick-axe to his Fiat after it failed to start.  The man apparently took over 100 whacks at the car.  As a former driver of a Fiat and owner of multiple examples of what Fiat’s sister corporation, Chrysler, calls an automobile, I sympathize with the gentleman, and wish him a quick recovery from his hospital stay for ‘rest.’
  • From the “My People” Department – The president of the Acme Foundry in Minnesota couldn’t have been surprised when he returned to work one morning to find that some wag had affixed images of Wyle E. Coyote and the Roadrunner on the side of his building.  The company did not let the levity stop its pre-Christmas work of producing the best anvils in the world, though.  In addition, new lines of safes and pianos will be ready for their debut early next year.

Thought for the Day

As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them. — President John F. Kennedy

Today is Veteran’s Day, and I’d like to ask a favor of you.  In addition to thanking a veteran, I want you to consider how many veterans need more than a handshake and a free meal.  I want you to think about the veterans who will sleep out in the cold tonight, who will be alone tonight, and who will be considering becoming one of the 22 a day who take their own lives tonight.  I want you to think of how you can be more than a smile and a thankful nod to them.  Please, even if only for a few hours or an evening, get involved, if only to be there for one of us who needs you.

Movie Quotes – Day 314

Young Gru: Mom, someday, I’m going to go to the moon.
Gru’s Mom: I’m afraid you’re too late, son. NASA isn’t sending the monkeys anymore.

Despicable Me

There is a balancing act that every parent goes through.  First, you want to encourage your children to succeed.  Second, you want to put your foot in their backside when they stop trying.  Third, you want to keep their expectations manageable.  The last thing you want to do is lay one of the three on too thick and either hold them up when they should be moving on their own, push them too hard, or crush their dreams.

Movie Quotes – Day 313

Blood has no nationality — Gattaca

No matter where we come from, what color our skin, or what faith or creed we follow, we are all human.   We divide ourselves in a lot of ways, but when we forget that basic truth, horrible things happen.

Movie Quotes – Day 312

No, if she had hated you she would have merely killed you. A curse takes devotion. — Dark Shadows

There are a lot of people who irritate me. There is a multitude of people for whom I have no feelings whatsoever. There are quite a few people I like, and even a few that I love. But there are only a handful that I truly dislike or even hate.  Such feelings take too much energy, and if I dislike you, why waste the energy?

Musings

  • Ladies, if you wake up at 2 AM and are having an internal body temperature fluctuation, it is not necessary to shut off the furnace completely on a night where it got down to 40 degrees.  Most modern thermometers actually allow you to reduce the temperature in the house without completely deactivating the furnace.
  • There were more posters about Ebola than there were about flu at the clinic this afternoon.  Guess which one is likely to be found in Louisville and kill you?
  • The good news the doctor at the walk-in clinic had for me is that, contrary to how I feel, I am not going to die.  The bad news is that what I have is viral, takes two to three weeks to completely go away, and is quite easy to spread.
  • I’m not sure if this hot toddy (peach tea, apple bourbon, and honey) is good for me, but it definitely feels good on my throat.
  • Many thanks to everyone who bought the book in the first few hours it was on sale.  I write because I enjoy it, but it’s always good to see proof that I’m not just doing it to entertain myself.  If you’ve got any comments about it, please leave them on the book’s Amazon page.
  • It’s amazing how many technical issues end with me saying “But it can’t be that easy!”.

Today’s Earworm

Saturday Morning Rant

It’s Saturday morning, I’m not feeling too terribly well, and I would really like to turn on the television and watch Bugs Bunny or Scooby Doo. But now, due to a lot of factors, including interference from the Department of Education, broadcast television has completely eliminated the Saturday morning cartoon.  I have to pay for cable TV to watch cartoons with my coffee, and those are either commercials for some verdammte toy line or some dreck that I could have drawn in the sixth grade.

The pleasure of watching a well-drawn and voiced cartoon rabbit dance to classical music and then drop an anvil on someone’s head is gone.  The joy of watching a stoner and his talking dog (Seriously, Shaggy, you need to talk to your dealer about what he’s mixing with your weed) search for ghosts while surviving the munchies is gone.   Heck, the soul-searing annoying song of a race of little blue men and their one, count her, one female is gone.

I blame you, America. It wasn’t good enough to teach physics by having coyotes run off of cliffs and then hang there.  It wasn’t good enough to watch a specialized combat team shoot millions of rounds and not hit one darned COBRA trooper.  It wasn’t enough for a group of animated heroes and villains to go on weekly road rallies around the world, thereby introducing the children of America to other cultures and their stereotypes.

No, it wasn’t good enough.  You had to go and make it ‘educational’.  You had to take time away from either the entertainment or the ad revenue to plug some educational or social cause du jeur, and eventually, you had taken away so much of the joy and the money in Saturday morning cartoons that both the audience and the broadcasters just gave up.

So now, I know what I won’t be doing this morning.  I know that I’ll have to pull down the DVD’s I have of Looney Tunes so that I can sand blast the roof of my mouth with Captain Crunch in front of the TV.  I know that I will have to work hard to keep the tradition of sitting in your pajamas and watching desert chase scenes alive.

I know all these things.

And knowing is half the battle.

Movie Quotes – Day 311

Rizzo: He’s some kind of a blind fiend.
Gonzo: I believe they prefer visually challenged fiend.

Muppet Treasure Island

At what point do I get to stop using modern euphemisms for things that have been said, with no bad connotations, for years?  Where is the shame in having a condition where you cannot use your eyes to see called being “blind”?  Is it really an insult to call someone who has trouble hearing “deaf”?  Can anyone point to where using the old words, with some obvious exceptions such as outright slurs, is derogatory?

Larry Correia makes a good point when he says that due to his Portuguese ancestry, he’s “Hispanic”, but he’s as white as I am, so I guess that doesn’t count.  I can see where someone whose ancestors greeted my ancestors when they got to Vinland objecting to being called “redskin”, or even “Indian”.  They are neither.  But “Aboriginal” or “Native American” is clunky. Would it be better if they said “Lakota” or “Blackfoot” instead?  Can’t we just say “American” and force others to treat us in the manner that name demands?

And by the way, I’m not a Caucasian.  I know people from the Caucasus, and they don’t look a heck of a lot like me.  If I have to pick a description, I prefer “Barbarian American” or “Green Eyed Devil”, thank you very much.