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Today’s Earworm
Posted by daddybear71 on January 11, 2016
https://daddybearsden.com/2016/01/11/todays-earworm-693/
Musings
- I learned a couple new things this weekend:
- Turn on a movie he likes and hasn’t seen in a long time, then tell him that he can watch it with you when his room is clean, and he will finish in record time.
- Take away every piece of electronics owned by a teenage girl and tell her to clean her room to earn them back, and her room will not only be done quickly, but also better than it’s ever been done before.
- Three of my four football teams played in the playoffs today. This makes for a good day.
- Boo learns words he shouldn’t repeat at school when he sits and watches the Vikings with me.
- If your team loses a critical game because of your stupidity, you should have to run laps around the stadium while the fans throw empty beer cans at you. Just saying.
- This is not a dig on a player who makes an honest mistake. This is for the jackasses who decided to hand a close game to the other team because they’re jackasses.
- We had our first french toast emergency this weekend. After a long stretch of warm weather, the temperature plunged, the rain froze on the roadways, and snow covered it. I expect to have to saddle up the mastadon to get to work tomorrow.
- I think Derby might have started life with a family that had a baby. Girlie Bear pulled an old baby doll out of her closet while she was cleaning her room and Derby immediately started wagging her tail and wanting to sniff the baby.
- I guess we’re a strange family. When Boo came to us to complain that the blade in his toy sword was loose in the hilt, I suggested he play with his gladius until I can repair it.
Posted by daddybear71 on January 10, 2016
https://daddybearsden.com/2016/01/10/musings-178/
News Roundup
- From the “Air Assault Parenting” Department – Spanish gynecologists have developed a speaker that is designed to stimulate the development and maturity of children as they grow in their mother’s womb. While the concept of using music directed at an unborn child is nothing new, their approach is. You see, rather than just putting a pair of headphones on the mother’s belly, this speaker is designed to be used internally. Yeah, so that happened. Ladies, repeat after me: good nutrition, healthy exercise, rest, prenatal medical care. Everything else can wait until after the little one is a cute bundle keeping you awake at 2 AM, and an infant doesn’t care about Mozart or the Winnie The Pooh wallpaper.
- From the “Going Places” Department – A young girl in Iowa showed a lot of personal initiative the other day when she penned a note to her mother trying to convince her that Christmas break had been extended. I look forward to her 2056 presidential campaign.
- From the “Flag On The Play” Department – A Buffalo Bills fan set himself on fire by jumping, not once, but twice, across a table which had been set aflame during pre-game festivities. By ‘festivities’ I mean ‘Getting liquored up and having a wonderful time’. Team doctors cleared him for play, and he started at fullback later that afternoon.
- From the “Whoopsie!” Department – A dummy Hellfire missile, which the U.S. sent to Spain for a training exercise, has ended up in the hands of the Cuban government. It appears that the missile was mis-sorted when it was shipped back to the United States, and somehow got put on a plane to Cuba while transiting France. No word yet on when the errant missile will return to the U.S., although sources report that it has developed an affinity for rum and good cigars. A spokesman for workers at the Paris airport reportedly told journalists that he ‘farts in their general direction’ when questioned about the incident.
Posted by daddybear71 on January 8, 2016
https://daddybearsden.com/2016/01/08/news-roundup-250/
Quote of the Day
I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears…in…rain. Time to die. — Rutger Hauer as Roy Batty, Blade Runner (1982)
Posted by daddybear71 on January 8, 2016
https://daddybearsden.com/2016/01/08/quote-of-the-day-161/
Weak Tea
Yesterday, after meeting with the Attorney General to confirm his biases and uninformed opinions, President Obama finalized plans for a series of executive initiatives which he hopes will make people think he’s still relevant when it comes to the subject of gun control.
I won’t enumerate or discuss them here, because better writers and thinkers than me have already done so.
What I do want to point out is just how ineffectual this president is, and to be honest, always has been, no matter the subject.
Obama came into office with a majority in the House of Representatives and a super-majority in the Senate. He and his party wielded that powerful tool until after the 2010 mid-term elections. They accomplished exactly one significant thing with it – Obamacare. That one, singular sensation was so odious that it had to be packed with carve-outs, bribes, and favors to get even the Democrats to vote for it. It is such a bad law that the President has had to delay its full implementation on multiple occasions, and it is currently in danger of imploding under its own weight.
Other than that, President Obama has accomplished, well, not much.
We have the Iran nuclear deal, which is off to a resoundingly bad start as Iran tests missiles, sometimes less than two kilometers from our ships. But, hey, the Iranians turned over the nuclear material we knew about to the Russians, who we all know can be trusted.
Speaking of Russia, how’s the President’s policy toward them working out? Well, if we’re being brutally honest, it’s not. A big chunk of Czechoslovakia Ukraine lies under Putin’s heel, and our NATO allies are more likely to work with Russia in Syria than they are to work with us.
Speaking of Syria, the President has made so many red lines, then scribbled them out, that the country must look like it lost a Sharpie fight with Jackie Chan. At the moment, the best that we can hope for is that the stable dictator is able to hold onto power so that the unstable horde doesn’t get its hands on the entire country. In the meantime, the most the President can do is have our pilots wave from 35,000 feet as they pass overhead while our Kurdish allies fight to hold what they’ve got.
Back on the domestic front, the President has focused his attention on gun control, but seems to be prescient enough to realize that he’s powerless to influence the direction of the country in that particular situation. That is, of course, unless you realize that every time he opens his noise hole, every company, craftsman, and merchant involved in the legal gun trade gets trampled by their customers buying every gun and bullet they can. Seriously, I know more people who went from neutrality on guns to “DB, what’s the best AR-15 under $1000, and where’s the best place to buy cheap ammo?” than I ever thought possible.
While we’re on that subject, I’d like to thank the President for swelling the ranks of the National Rifle Association, the Second Amendment Foundation, and the myriad other gun rights organizations across the country. We couldn’t have done it without you, big guy. It is my sincere hope that after you leave office, somebody thinks to send you a ball cap or something for your efforts. Now that I think about it, the NRA ought to start a new prize, named for the President, which recognizes the person who does the most to grow the NRA and get people into the gun stores and shooting ranges.
So, here we are, with the lamest duck I’ve ever seen. His super-majority in Congress is a distant memory, and the best he can do now is t say “While I’m President, try to do what the law has told you to do since before I rolled my first joint.” But, remember folks, he’s the most powerful man in in the world, and quite possibly the smartest. Just ask him and his dwindling crowds of adoring fans.
I’ve always wondered what it would look like if this country didn’t have leadership or even management at the top. Looks like I’m about to find out.
Posted by daddybear71 on January 5, 2016
https://daddybearsden.com/2016/01/05/weak-tea/
Your Daily Snark
Posted by daddybear71 on January 3, 2016
https://daddybearsden.com/2016/01/03/your-daily-snark/
Cynical Musings
- Figuring out how much money you want to donate to the Red Cross so that the desired amount gets to the people in need is a lot like figuring out how long to sentence someone to prison so that they actually serve the desired number of years.
“Well, you want them to serve 10 years, so you have to factor in “Be good” time, “Took an art class” time, “Finally got their GED” time, and “We just take time off to save money” time, so you’ll have to sentence them to 25 years.”
“Well, you want $100 to get to the people in need, so you have to factor in the administrative costs, fundraising costs, travel to luxurious conference locations costs, princely salaries for the people at the top of the organization costs, and of course, “we just lost track of that” costs, so you’ll have to donate $250.”
- Oh, no, don’t broadcast the games being played by teams who have a credible shot at getting into the playoffs. Let’s watch teams that gave up a month ago. Or, you know, games between historical rivals that are always interesting to watch. No, really, it’s cool, I’ll just sit here and watch the guys who are making mid-winter vacation plans during half-time. Or not.
- I’m sure all the liberal arts colleges that are sending multiple, colorful, and thick ‘invitations’ to Girlie Bear are reaching out to her out of a hope that they can contribute to her education and future earning potential.
- If you don’t like that the new neighbor tore down the eyesore next to his house and is putting up a large barn / workshop, then maybe you should have bought the land when it sat on the market for three years.
- This afternoon, I stood in front of a tee-shirt shop, listening to Jody Watley and Biz Markey, waiting on a teenage girl to make up her mind. Is this 1989 or 2016?
Posted by daddybear71 on January 3, 2016
https://daddybearsden.com/2016/01/03/cynical-musings/
Today’s Earworm
Posted by daddybear71 on January 2, 2016
https://daddybearsden.com/2016/01/02/todays-earworm-687/
Today’s Earworm
Posted by daddybear71 on January 2, 2016
https://daddybearsden.com/2016/01/02/todays-earworm-688/
Musings
- Today was a good day. I slept in, had a wonderful homemade breakfast, drank beer, watched football, ate chili with good friends, and showed someone how to field strip and reassemble an AR-15.
- You know how when you finish a drive at night and relax when you get to the end of your driveway? Yeah, that feeling disappeared when Moonshine decided to go for a jog in the pitch dark.
- Nothing like trying to find a black dog on a dark street.
- We relented to the “No Video Games” rule for Boo this weekend and let him play Wii for about an hour. I played a bit too, and I discovered something that surprised me. I put a “Call of Duty” game in after he went to bed, and played for a while. It bored me. Like “Eh, let’s play Sports Resort and pop balloons from a bi-plane” bored.
- There are few things cuter and more appealing than an 8 week old Golden Retriever.
- I had to give the rest of the family “The Look” when we snuggled the puppy. We are officially full.
- Yes, Boo got a pat down before getting into the car. Why do you ask?
Posted by daddybear71 on January 2, 2016
https://daddybearsden.com/2016/01/02/musings-177/







