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Inventory

The following items are present in the bed with The Young Prince this evening as we attempt to get him to fall asleep:

  1. Pillow
  2. Soft Blanket
  3. Quilt, not so soft
  4. Snowman Flannel Sheet Set
  5. Hasenpfeffer the Bunny
  6. Timmy the Sheep
  7. Magic Wand
  8. Toy Helicopter
  9. Tambourine*
  10. Snuggle the Bear (Promotional toy from our last trip to the grocery store)
  11. Woody the Cowboy (Talking)*
  12. Buzz the Spaceman (Also talking, in both English and Spanish, and playing sound effects, and flashing laser beams)*
  13. One copy of One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish

I swear that somewhere under his bed is a horde of other toys, because occasionally we hear something that wasn’t accounted for as he drifts off to sleep.  I’m amazed there’s still room for Boo.

*Hell hath no wrath as a set of aunts whose childless sister, who has been giving their kids obnoxious presents for years, suddenly has a child of her own.

by daddybear71 on December 14, 2011  •  Permalink
Posted in kids

Posted by daddybear71 on December 14, 2011

https://daddybearsden.com/2011/12/14/inventory/

News Roundup

  • From the “Cutting It Short” Department – The White House has ordered the U.S. Mint to halt production of presidential commemorative dollar coins in order to save money.  Apparently, almost $1.4 billion in coins that have already been struck have been returned to the Federal Reserve.  I’ve been places that relied on coins for small denominations, and it seemed to work, but the U.S. hasn’t done that in any real sense for almost 100 years.  Honestly, the amount of trouble and expense it would take to change over would cost almost as much as the amount saved in not printing dollar bills.  Oh well, I’ve got our stash of Sacajawea dollars for tooth fairy money.   On a side note, I have found that my stash of military challenge coins makes for great pirate booty or Harry Potter money.
  • From the “Justified” Department – A man in Florida has had the charges against him dismissed after a judge found that he had a right to defend himself under that states “Stand Your Ground” statute after he shot his ex-wife’s boyfriend.  The boyfriend is believed to have threatened and lunged at the man.  Kentucky has a similar law, and I hope to never have to take advantage of it.  Anyone in Florida want to tell us if he can still be sued in civil court?  That would be the perfect counterpart.
  • From the “Going to Hell On A Scholarship” Department – A charity that provides CARE packages to deployed soldiers and homeless veterans is among the victims of a scam that lost it nearly $3000.  Guys, that just ain’t Christmas. I hope that the charity is able to make up the loss, and that the thieves are caught and hung up by their jingle bells.
  • From the “Parents of the Year” Department – A Russian couple is in trouble after police spotted the mother putting what turned out to be a bag of heroin into the mouth of their 9 year old child.  Everything I’ve ever said about my parents?  Yeah, that pales in comparison.  Hopefully Ozzie and Harriet have a rather unpleasant experience in a Siberian prison for this.
  • From the “Just Good Old Boys” Department – A Miami police officer is trying to explain how his cruiser ended up vertical alongside a telephone pole.  No word yet on whether or not he was chasing Bo and Luke Duke at the time of the incident.  Neither Boss Hogg nor Uncle Jesse could be reached for comment.
  • From the “Christmas Pineapples” Department – A military museum in Sweden has come under PSH fire after it began selling Christmas ornaments shaped like hand grenades to raise money for a charity.  I’m not sure if that’s Christmas either, but I like it.  “Honey, have you run the trip wire to the Christmas tree yet?  Remember, front towards enemy when you’re setting the holiday claymore!  This’ll keep those little scamps from shaking their gifts early!”
  • From the “Ho Ho Ho” Department – The United States Senate took time off from their busy schedule of accelerating the countries circle of the drain yesterday to exchange gifts in a “Secret Santa” program.  That’s right folks, the most powerful legislature in the world celebrated the holiday the same way the accounting department at Crazy Morty’s House of Junk does.  Of course, when they’re doing this, they’re not making more problems for the country, so I guess it’s for the best.  Some senators got a gift of coal, but no senators report getting what they really deserve:  pink slips.
by daddybear71 on December 13, 2011  •  Permalink
Posted in news

Posted by daddybear71 on December 13, 2011

https://daddybearsden.com/2011/12/13/news-roundup-53/

Frak

Two boys in Texas are recovering from gunshot wounds after being hit with what authorities believe were stray bullets from nearby hunters.  The boys were playing basketball at their school, which has several areas open to hunting around it, when they were shot.  Investigators are questioning several landowners and hunters.  Both boys are still in the hospital, hopefully on the mend.

This is a Rule 4 violation of immense proportions.  In my search for a place to hunt, I struggle to find a landowner that both allows hunters to use their land and doesn’t have neighbors too close for comfort.  This is one of the reasons I love hunting at Fort Knox, even though it’s not the most productive hunting ground on Earth.  I can pretty much guarantee that the only people who are out in the woods with me within the conceivable range of my gun are other hunters plastered in blaze orange.

I have gone hunting on small farms that have homes on all sides of me, and I have to do a lot of work to make sure to scout out shooting lanes so that there is very little chance of a bullet, either a pass-through or a miss, going near someone’s home or kids playing in their yard.  My worst fear is that I will negligently hurt someone, and I try to make sure that I don’t even come close to inconveniencing the neighbors.

We all know the Four Rules.  We all need to follow them, and police our buddies so that they follow all of them, both in letter and spirit.  Two children are now in the hospital because of a split second of negligence and all hunters and shooters will be associated with incidents like this.  We must work together to make sure that when we are given a reputation gained through our lowest denominator, it’s not one that can be held against us.

by daddybear71 on December 13, 2011  •  Permalink
Posted in Guns

Posted by daddybear71 on December 13, 2011

https://daddybearsden.com/2011/12/13/frak/

30 Days of Heinlein – Day 10

Duty is a debt you owe to yourself to fulfill obligations you have assumed voluntarily.  — Time Enough For Love

by daddybear71 on December 13, 2011  •  Permalink
Posted in Heinlein

Posted by daddybear71 on December 13, 2011

https://daddybearsden.com/2011/12/13/30-days-of-heinlein-day-10/

Thought for the Day

Man hath no love like that of a labrador retriever in the vicinity of a three year old eating french fries and chicken nuggets.

by daddybear71 on December 13, 2011  •  Permalink
Posted in food, kids, pets

Posted by daddybear71 on December 13, 2011

https://daddybearsden.com/2011/12/13/thought-for-the-day-32/

TV Series Idea

A black and white display.  A thin man in a dark suit comes on and intones with a deep voice:

Consider if you will DaddyBear, a middle-aged man in American suburbia. He is trying to get ready to take his daughter to her chorus recital, but is instead having a nervous breakdown.
He has spent the past 45 minutes looking for his camera, which he had used less than 12 hours before.
He found the camera itself tucked inside a toy box, under a pile of Lincoln Logs and Matchbox cars.
The batteries to the camera are still lost, but have been replaced with the batteries from a flashlight.
The memory card for the camera was, however, not in the camera.
A search of his home was fruitless, until he went to take out a DVD for his smallest son to watch for the evening while he is home with his mother.
Inside the DVD case for “Frosty the Snowman/Rudolph the Reindeer”, instead of the expected DVD, he found his memory stick.
His mind finally snapped when he took it out and found it liberally coated with honey.

He is about to enter….. The Parenting Zone

by daddybear71 on December 12, 2011  •  Permalink
Posted in Uncategorized

Posted by daddybear71 on December 12, 2011

https://daddybearsden.com/2011/12/12/tv-series-idea/

Today in History

On December 12, 1985, Airow Air Flight 1285 crashed just after take off from Gander, Newfoundland.  The crash and resulting fire killed 256 people, including 248 soldiers of the 101st Airborne Division.  These soldiers were returning from peacekeeping duty in the Sinai.  Their mission was not one of conquest or nation building.  They placed their lightly armed bodies between two countries that had fought multiple wars so that the Camp David Accords could have time to become a habitual peace instead of a footnote in history.

Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God. — The Gospel of Saint Matthew, Chapter 5, Verse 9

H/T to Blackfive for the reminder.

by daddybear71 on December 12, 2011  •  Permalink
Posted in military

Posted by daddybear71 on December 12, 2011

https://daddybearsden.com/2011/12/12/today-in-history/

News Roundup

  • From the “Transparency” Department – A recent report about spending at several U.N. agencies finds the agencies refuse to open their books so that outsiders can see whether the money the agencies are given, most donated by U.N. member nations, is spent appropriately.  Some agencies have large overages, and won’t show why budgeted cash isn’t being spent.  I say we cut them off until they start coming across with audits by Deloitte.
  • From the “Skymall Taser” Department – Fox News is giving advice on how to politely discourage chatty co-travelers while you are flying to your holiday destination.  I don’t mind a little chat during the run up to the flight, but after we take off, it’s not hard to sell the “I can’t hear you because my ears won’t pop” schtick if I don’t want to talk.
  • From the “Expensive Labor” Department – San Fransisco is making headlines because the city fathers have raised the minimum wage in the city to $10.24 an hour.  That’s right kids.  The teenager working at the Starbucks on Pier 39 is making over 10 dollars an hour.  Proponents of the change are dismissing assertions by business owners that they will be laying off staff to cover the increased cost of labor.  Apparently having a business in San Fransisco is so wonderful that it is worth any cost, or something.
  • From the “Caseload” Department – The Supreme Court has agreed to take on the case of the state of Arizona’s new immigration law.  The federal government convinced the 9th Circuit Court of Appeals that states may only enforce those immigration laws that Washington approves.  The Arizona law makes it legal for police to inquire about immigration status, mandates that immigrants carry their identification with them, and makes it illegal under state law for an illegal alien to hold or seek a job.  The case could be heard early enough to have a decision out before the final run to the election next fall.  Do we really need the highest court in the land to say it’s OK for a state to enforce federal laws the federal government refuses to enforce?
by daddybear71 on December 12, 2011  •  Permalink
Posted in news

Posted by daddybear71 on December 12, 2011

https://daddybearsden.com/2011/12/12/news-roundup-54/

Quote of the Day

Lutefisk – Norwegians put butter on it, Swedes put brown sugar on it,  the cats put sand on it.

Tom Griswold, of the Bob and Tom Show,* reading from a reader letter about Scandinavian food.

I have had lutefisk precisely three times in my life, all three in an attempt to bring joy to the heart of my grandmother, a German woman who wholly took on Norwegian culture and ‘cuisine’ when she married my Norwegian grandfather.  Now that I’m grown and she’s up in heaven giving my grandfather an earful about his verdammte grandson, I don’t let it in the house.

*That link is probably NSFW.

by daddybear71 on December 12, 2011  •  Permalink
Posted in Uncategorized

Posted by daddybear71 on December 12, 2011

https://daddybearsden.com/2011/12/12/quote-of-the-day-34/

30 Days of Heinlein – Day 9

All societies are based on rules to protect pregnant women and young children. All else is surplusage, excrescence, adornment, luxury, or folly, which can — and must — be dumped in emergency to preserve this prime function. — Time Enough For Love

by daddybear71 on December 12, 2011  •  Permalink
Posted in Heinlein

Posted by daddybear71 on December 12, 2011

https://daddybearsden.com/2011/12/12/30-days-of-heinlein-day-9/

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