- From the “Good Walk Spoiled” Department – A man in Texas is recovering after his groin was impaled with the shaft of a broken putter during a fight on the golf course. All you gentlemen may now uncross your legs. Reports are that his femoral artery was cut, so he’s lucky to be alive. How do you score that? If his balls were hit once, is that an eagle or a hole in one?
- From the “About….FACE!” Department – President Obama is urging his supporters to donate to a super PAC that goes by the name of “Priorities USA”. This would allow his supporters to donate ginormous amounts of cash to support his reelection bid without bumping up against those pesky donation limits. I don’t really care for that name. I think the first black president should call his super PAC the “Totally Unaffiliated Political Action Committee”. That way any underhanded dealings by the PAC would be hard to trace back to the president. Also, something tells me that TUPAC would do really well on the West Coast, a critical region for the president’s fund raising efforts.
- From the “Local News” Department – A new company formed from the owners of a successful amusement park has begun negotiating to take over a failed amusement park here in Louisville. Kentucky Kingdom has failed twice before, including when it was run by Six Flags. This brings up that venerable question: How do you make a small fortune running an amusement park in Louisville? And the answer, of course, begins with “Well, you start with a large fortune….”.
- From the “Straw Man” Department – 13 people have been arrested in Texas after being accused of making gun purchases for a Mexican drug cartel. No word yet on how many of them have ATF “Get Out of Jail Free” cards.
- From the “Mother of the Year” Department – A woman in Memphis was arrested recently when police found that she had left her children in a running car while she went to have her nails done. When police were talking to her, she dropped a bag of weed into the car, and police also noticed that one of the small children was holding a loaded handgun and pointing it at the officers. Wow, that’s quite a lot going on. You’ve got a woman leaving her kids in the car so she can get her nails done did, a bag of marijuana dropped in the floorboards, and a child with a loaded handgun. She must have stayed up late at night to think up that much fail. Wonder what she’ll do for an encore?
News Roundup
Posted by daddybear71 on February 8, 2012
https://daddybearsden.com/2012/02/08/news-roundup-26/
Children’s Book Ideas
I was doing the Dr. Seuss thing with Boo tonight, and a part of my mind wandered. It came back with these title ideas for children’s books:
- If You Give a Moose a Mosin
- One Gun, Two Gun, Brown gun, Blued gun
- Pauly the Prepper Buries a Supply Cache
- Cosmoline the Clown
- Boo Magoo and the Tea Party Trio
- A is for Appleseed, B is for Boomerite
- 10 Little Gunnies
- Where the Stabby Things Are
- Gary the Goose Gets a Great Garand
- Ricky Ruger Goes to the Range
20 years of reading books to little kids might have twisted my mind a little.
Posted by daddybear71 on February 8, 2012
https://daddybearsden.com/2012/02/08/childrens-book-ideas/
Today’s Earworm II
Posted by daddybear71 on February 8, 2012
https://daddybearsden.com/2012/02/08/todays-earworm-ii/
Quote of the Day
I have known a vast quantity of nonsense talked about bad men not looking you in the face. Don’t trust that conventional idea. Dishonesty will stare honesty out of countenance, any day in the week, if there is anything to be got by it. — Charles Dickens, born February 7, 1812, Hunted Down
Posted by daddybear71 on February 7, 2012
https://daddybearsden.com/2012/02/07/quote-of-the-day-20/
Why DaddyBear Doesn’t Drink Too Often
I had a heck of a bad day yesterday. The kind that I will look back on someday and say “Well, at least today wasn’t that bad.”
So when I got home last night, I needed to burn off some steam and raise my spirits. A good dinner whipped up by my loving, wonderful, beautiful wife, hugs from the daughter, and a protracted light saber duel with Boo helped a lot. After the kids went to bed, I thought I’d cap it off with a couple libations and shooting a few electronic Nazis. Never did finish that level in Call of Duty, but I finished off the last bottle of beer, then had a bit of fine, aged corn liquor.
I didn’t get drunk, but I was definitely relaxed and happy by the time I went to bed.
What tells me I was a bit more tipsy than I thought is a sticky note I found on my laptop this morning:
Blog Ideas:
Turret mounted potato guns
Koi ponds as emergency food source
Presidential debates with physical challenges
California succession – pros and cons
Airdrop Hi-Points into Syria
I really need to either drink more often or drop it entirely.
Posted by daddybear71 on February 7, 2012
https://daddybearsden.com/2012/02/07/why-daddybear-doesnt-drink-too-often/
30 Days of Twain – Day 6
The citizen who thinks he sees that the commonwealth’s political clothes are worn out, and yet holds his peace and does not agitate for a new suit, is disloyal, he is a traitor. That he may be the only one who thinks he sees this decay, does not excuse him: it is his duty to agitate anyway, and it is the duty of others to vote him down if they do not see the matter as he does.
My Take – Pointing out that the emperor has no clothes is the whole point of the freedom of speech. The ability to cuss on a record, complain to the editor that your neighbors are loud at 3 AM, or to read whatever books you want are bonuses. If you don’t use the right to try to convince others that the government needs a thorough sweeping every so often, especially when you know it does, you’re part of the problem.
Posted by daddybear71 on February 7, 2012
https://daddybearsden.com/2012/02/07/30-days-of-twain-day-6/
Today’s Earworm
Ahhh, memories….. If I’d only had this song on that morning in 1991 life might have been quite different.
Posted by daddybear71 on February 7, 2012
https://daddybearsden.com/2012/02/07/todays-earworm-54/
Scope Creep
Condition #1: The original owner of the house put in an under-the-house garage with a rear driveway. This necessitated the excavating of a humongous amount of earth and the installation of several retaining walls.
Condition #2: We have a small child, and our next door neighbor had a baby in October, so we will have another rugrat roaming the back yard.
Condition #3: We have several fenced areas in our backyard for safety and to restrict the roaming of children and dogs, but there is nothing on the side of the retaining walls that faces our next door neighbor.
Condition #4: I don’t want our next door neighbor’s child or anyone else to get hurt.
Condition #5: I don’t want to get sued.
My Solution:
- Build a picket fence from the corner of the house to the corner of the detached shed/garage in the back corner of the property, with a walking gate in it that has a hasp and padlock on it.
- The fence will run just inside and parallel to the property line.
The Solution that I ‘agreed’ to after discussing my solution with Irish Woman:
- The fence as I conceived it shall indeed be built.
- Extend the fence that surrounds the upper part of our back yard toward the back of the property, marrying it up with the fence for the dog’s area, with a new gate on that new section of fence.
- Rip out two sides of the fence to the dog’s area, opening up the back yard.
- Add a gate to the back portion of the upper fence so that we can get to the back part of the yard without leaving the yard.
- Move two raised 4’x8’x3′ garden beds, and construct another. This includes moving the dirt.
- Extend a retaining wall to cut down on erosion and ground shifting as the earth tries to move back into the area that some idiot dug out the backyard so that he coud have a walkout basement.
Note to self: Next time, just go buy the lumber and concrete, dig the holes, and build the fence before discussing it. You’d think I would have learned by now.
Posted by daddybear71 on February 7, 2012
https://daddybearsden.com/2012/02/07/scope-creep/
News Roundup
- From the “Stop Touching It!” Department – A man in Georgia was injured when he shot himself while re-loading his gun after leaving a gun show. Most gun shows require that all guns brought in be unloaded before entering the show. Ladies and gentlemen, guns, like a lot of things in life, are more likely to go off the more you touch them. One of the things I’ve had to teach myself and I’ve seen in a lot of shooters is that once it’s in the holster, leave it alone. Granted, he wasn’t fooling with it, but the point is the same: The more you touch it, the more likely you are to get a bad surprise. Also, when you’re loading, unloading, wiping, looking at, and considering buying, follow the Four Rules. Negligent discharges happen to everyone. Keeping it from being pointed at you or anything else you don’t want shot will keep embarrassment from turning into pain.
- From the “An Arm and a Leg” Department – Experts are predicting that the cost of a gallon of gasoline will top $4.00 a gallon soon, and may go higher. This weekend, my gas was a handgun caliber. I paid $3.57 a gallon for gas. Soon, it may be $3.80. I hope it doesn’t go to $5.00.
- From the “More Balls Than Brains” Department – An Austrian man is planning to try to freefall from 120,000 feet up, break the sound barrier on the way down, then parachute down to a soft landing. Since he’s replicating research jumps done in the 1950’s that were part of the early space program, I don’t know what he hopes to accomplish other than be able to say he did it. I wish him luck, but I caution that there’s not a lot of difference between “controlled parachute landing” and “authorities are combing the hills for the larger bits”.
- From the “Hey Mom! Guess what!” Department – A helicopter with mechanical problems recently made an emergency landing at an elementary school in California. Thankfully, no-one was hurt. This must have made for some interesting “How did school go today?” conversations around the dinner table. Something tells me it was pretty hard to get little Johnny and Susie to concentrate on diagramming sentences that afternoon. Might as well just put them all in the lunch room and watch movies.
Posted by daddybear71 on February 6, 2012
https://daddybearsden.com/2012/02/06/news-roundup-27/
30 Days of Twain – Day 5
When the doctrine of allegiance to party can utterly up-end a man’s moral constitution and make a temporary fool of him besides, what excuse are you going to offer for preaching it, teaching it, extending it, perpetuating it? Shall you say, the best good of the country demands allegiance to party? Shall you also say it demands that a man kick his truth and his conscience into the gutter, and become a mouthing lunatic, besides?
Posted by daddybear71 on February 6, 2012
https://daddybearsden.com/2012/02/06/30-days-of-twain-day-5/
DaddyBear
DaddyBear’s Den 