- From the “Eye In The Sky” Department – The ACLU is suing the LAPD again, but this time it doesn’t have to do with nightsticks, flashlights, and car chases. In this case, the ACLU wants to know the process by which the police put the automobiles of citizens into a list of targets for its “Automatic License Plate Reader” system. What basically happens is that cameras connected to computers are placed on objects such as traffic lights and street signs, and they automatically examine every license plate that goes by them. If the license plate is on a “hot list” of targets, data such as time and location are recorded for later retrieval by the police. Police say that the system is essential in situations such as an AMBER alert for missing children, but won’t say what the criteria is for putting someone on the list, how police decide to take them off, and what non-police oversight is exercised on the system. Police also say they use the system to track the movements of convicted sex offenders, even though they may not be under investigation for any current crime. As disgusting as I find sex offenders, I have an issue with the state spending money to create a system that can not only track sex offenders, but could also be easily abused to track the whereabouts of any citizen they decide they need to keep tabs on. There may be benefits to such a system in an emergency, but it shouldn’t be a dragnet. Unless there are controls in place to minimize abuse, then it shouldn’t be used, and the controls should be transparent to the rest of us.
- From the “Mutton, Honey” Department – A university in Canada is trying to sell off 300 head of sheep from its research facility in one lot. Apparently, the cost of maintaining the herd is too much for the school after budget cuts, and they want the herd to stay intact. Well, they want to sell them all at once. Staying intact probably isn’t going to happen, because about two hours after I bought 300 sheep, a good number of them would be working their way through a facility to separate their fuzzy bits from their edible bits. Too bad it’s such a pain to move livestock across the border, because I haven’t had good lamb in a long time. Remember kids, Easter lambs make good Memorial Day dinners.
- From the “Butt Above the Grass” Department – A cemetery in Massachusetts has rejected a headstone inscription that included profanity. It seems that using a four letter word on your grave marker might offend someone in the grave yard. Profanity in public is frowned upon in our Puritan society. This is why I learned to swear in multiple languages. It’s amazing how you can mutter to yourself in Russian or Serb, and no-one calls HR. Plus, let’s be honest, English is probably lucky to be in the top 10 list of languages when it comes to swearing. Some languages make it an art form. Who would do a better job cussing someone out, an Italian from Boston or her cousin from Naples?
- From the “Oopsie” Department – The National Health Service in Britain has had 750 “never” incidents in the past four years. These incidents, such as doctors leaving instruments inside a patient or operating on the wrong body part, are ones that should “never” happen. One of the more shocking was a rather high number of cases where a feeding tube was inserted into the patient’s lungs, which I can’t imagine is a very healthy thing at all. I wonder how the statistics for American hospitals looks? By the way, it is never a good idea to read a book on methods for improving hospital and medical safety just before going in for inpatient surgery. Irish Woman worked for a company that worked on digitization of medical records and radiology a few years ago, and they handed out just such a book to their employees, and I gave it a read. It was absolutely fascinating, but not a good thing to have on your mind when you’re putting on the backwards gown and a surgical beret.
- From the “Fake Firewater” Department – Officials in Russia recently raided a warehouse that contained 300,000 bottles of counterfeit vodka, cognac, and wine. Instead of name brand hooch, the bottles were filled with what amounted to moonshine. Food purity and false labeling are one of the few areas where I believe that a little government oversight, within reason, is not a bad thing. Imagine buying what you think is a good bottle of cognac, then waking up blind because it contained methanol. For the most part, I stayed away from alcohol when I was in Russia, with the exception of the occasional tipple at the Liberty Bar in the embassy. It was the height of the Yeltsin period, there were daily reports of tainted vodka or whatever in the newspapers, and let’s be honest, I’m not the sharpest tack in the box when I start drinking. Trust me, you don’t want the inhibitions that keep me wrapped up nice and neat to peel away like a belly dancer doing the dance of 1000 veils. It’s not pretty, and it causes me to have to apologize to scores of people.
- From the “Thumb in the Eye” Department – The final piece of One World Trade Center has been put in place, making the skyscraper officially 1776 feet in height. It’s been over 11 years since 9/11, and while the skyline on Manhattan will never be the same, this building helps to fill the gap. I think it should be looked at as a big middle finger pointed toward the Middle East. All it’s missing is a head on a pike at its pinnacle.
- From the “Justice” Department – A man who ran from a traffic stop in Florida the other night was arrested at a local hospital after he went there seeking treatment for wounds he got when he was attacked by an alligator. Apparently as Mookie was giving the boys in blue a slip, a reptilian citizen decided to intervene and took a chunk out of his face, arm, and armpit. No word yet on whether the alligator will be rewarded for doing his civic duty, but I for one hope that he gets his due, hopefully in the form of a certificate and a flock of plump chickens.
All posts by daddybear71
News Roundup
Posted by daddybear71 on May 10, 2013
https://daddybearsden.com/2013/05/10/news-roundup-189/
Thoughts on the Day
- At the doctor’s office today, the tongue depressors tasted like snozberries.
- Whoever thought to flavor doctor’s instruments for kids should be given a Nobel Prize.
- The President has one he’s not using. I’m sure he could be persuaded to part with it.
- Whoever thought to flavor doctor’s instruments for kids should be given a Nobel Prize.
- The doctor was shocked at the difference between how Boo is now compared to how he was when we first went to her practice 18 months ago.
- Intense speech and occupational therapy, along with full-time preschool in an environment that’s designed for kids with learning problems, has cleared up just about all of his issues.
- It weren’t cheap, but it were worth it.
- My project-management skills were tested today, but were not found wanting.
- Go ahead, throw murky, almost unintelligible tasks at me, including things that I’ve never done before, and to be honest scare the daylights out of me, and I will have them scheduled in time to get out to my truck before it starts raining.
- Fastest project plan and change control in the west.
- The Louisville Friends of the NRA banquet is going to happen on September 7.
- More details to follow, but if anyone wants banquet tickets or tickets for the AR-15 we’re holding a drawing for in June, let me know.
- Quoth the Irish Woman – “Don’t you already have an AR-15?”
- My reply was “You can never have too many!”
- To the guy who yelled “NRA sucks!” at me when you saw the sticker on my truck’s rear window during a traffic light tonight, I will always treasure the look on your face when I replied with “I wish your mom had!”.
Posted by daddybear71 on May 9, 2013
https://daddybearsden.com/2013/05/09/thoughts-on-the-day-129/
Thought for the Day
If you’d followed this advice last year, you’d already be way ahead of the market.
Posted by daddybear71 on May 8, 2013
https://daddybearsden.com/2013/05/08/thought-for-the-day-193/
Thoughts on the Day
- Not sure what was going on last night, but I dreamt in Korean.
- I speak precisely six words in Korean – Soju, Mekju, Bulgogi, Kimchi, Kamsahamnida, and Anyanghaseyo.
- Yes, I know, some of those are more than one word.
- Not surprisingly, I have no idea what my dream was about, but looking on the bright side, I did wake up with a stress headache.
- Kentucky people need to learn that they can’t out-stubborn me.
- If I say I can’t do what you need without more input from you, and you don’t give me the input, I’m perfectly happy to wait forever before doing what you say you need.
- It took me four hours of work today to be able to report “Nope, can’t be done”.
- Luckily for me, my co-workers agreed to my work-around, so it wasn’t all wasted time.
- The drive home tonight made me miss North Dakota, where there weren’t enough people to piss me off.
- Boo had his latest kindergarten orientation today. Irish Woman got a bunch of paperwork.
- It included the fee and tuition list for next year.
- He’s going into pre-kindergarten, and we’re paying several hundred dollars for books.
- Yeah, I don’t know either.
- Girlie Bear was selected to go to JROTC summer camp this June.
- She leaves on June 6.
- That’s right, she goes off to an Army summer camp on D-Day.
- She was so proud that she got issued ACU’s today.
- Anyone know how you iron those wrinkle factories?
- And what’s up with boots you don’t polish?
- What are you people doing to my Army?
- My basket at the store tonight contained a 100 foot network cable, a roll of duct tape, flashlight batteries, shoe polish, tortilla chips, and a soda.
- The lady who checked me out asked me where the party was going to be.
Posted by daddybear71 on May 8, 2013
https://daddybearsden.com/2013/05/08/thoughts-on-the-day-128/
Today’s Earworm
It’s been one of those days.
Posted by daddybear71 on May 8, 2013
https://daddybearsden.com/2013/05/08/todays-earworm-359/
Thoughts on the Day
- It’s amazing how smoothly things work when everyone does not only what they’re supposed to do, but also what they’ve said they would do.
- If you ask the impossible, don’t be surprised if my plan for fulfilling your request is improbable.
- We got through the end of the year school picnic without Boo doing his Forrest Gump impression. We had a much better time than we did last year.
- It took precisely 3 minutes to upgrade the RAM on the iMac. Irish Woman is quite happy that it doesn’t take five minutes to start iPhoto, and Chrome comes up instantly.
- For the moment, I am The Man.
- Subject to immediate downgrade to The Putz, of course.
- For the moment, I am The Man.
- Note to neighbors: If you don’t like the plans that the owners of the business-zoned vacant lot are thinking of doing with their property in order to make it productive again, then feel free to buy it from them and then do with it as you wish.
- Seriously, until you’re ready to do that, please shut up before the civic-minded local owner decides to say “Screw it” and sells the place to an out-of-state developer who will bluntly tell you where you can shove your opinions.
- Advanced planning and preparations for Boo’s birthday party are underway.
- Apparently the event is going to happen on Saturday.
- I am buying food to feed an army. If I’m eating leftovers from this past about Monday, then Irish Woman is going to have some ‘splaining to do.
- When Irish Woman threw my 40th birthday party, I was eating leftovers for over a week. I eventually ended up putting all of the fresh fruit in the dehydrator because we couldn’t eat it quickly enough.
Posted by daddybear71 on May 7, 2013
https://daddybearsden.com/2013/05/07/thoughts-on-the-day-127/
An Open Letter
Dear Netflix –
Why did you wait until the evening I replaced the piece of garbage Cisco wireless router with an Airport Extreme to hold a “we’re not having an outage, just being slow enough to be irritating” event? I spent an hour messing around with the new router and looking at my basement ceiling thinking “Where can I safely drill a hole for a network cable?” before I thought “Hey, I should see if it’s slow and clunky on Amazon Videos too!”. Much to my relief, Amazon’s video output was fault-free, whereas yours plays for about a minute, goes back to buffering, then goes back to playing for another minute or two.
Do you have people watching my house to see when I do things like this? HOW DO YOU KNOW?
Hugs and Kisses
Daddy J. Bear
Posted by daddybear71 on May 7, 2013
https://daddybearsden.com/2013/05/07/an-open-letter-15/
News Roundup
- From the “Irony” Department – The chief of staff of an Air Force effort to reduce cases of sexual assault in the service has been arrested for sexual battery. It would appear that in between hours spent trying to figure out how to get male personnel to stop harassing and assaulting female personnel, this guy likes to get liquored up and assault strange women in parking lots. I’m sure he can look forward to an abbreviated career handing out towels in the gym in Greenland, assuming that he can learn to keep his hands to himself. I’m confused by the issues with sexual assault in the military, to be honest. How hard is it to teach young men to keep their hands and other appendages to themselves? Where are the senior NCO’s? I’m pretty sure the first time some dumbass who decided that a female soldier needed his attention, whether or not she wanted it, was publicly shamed and berated by a Command Sergeant Major, with or without the use of dimensional lumber, the problem in that unit would dry up pretty quickly. Step one should be telling young soldiers to keep their hands to themselves, step two should be a battalion formation to watch a rapist get 40 lashes. General Washington would approve. It’s only cruel and unusual if you don’t do it often enough.
- From the “Socialism at Work” Department – Residents of a San Fransisco neighborhood held a Cinco de Mayo party where they smashed pinatas in the shape of Google commuter busses. Apparently, they feel that the entry of talented, employed, and motivated people in to their decaying neighborhood is a bad thing. Hey, if you want lower-income people to not only be able to, but also want to, live in your area, stop turning it into a high-cost, high-crime, low-opportunity craphole. I’ve seen pictures of middle-class neighborhoods in San Fransisco in the 1950’s and earlier, and they were quite nice. Unfortunately, the adults stopped running that city in the late 1960’s, and now decent people can’t afford to live there unless they make a huge amount of money and are willing to work outside the city. Either quit making things worse, or get out of the way of people who will make it better.
- From the “Unintended Consequences” Department – Democratic leadership appears to be asking Illegal Mayors Against Guns to stop trying to unseat Democrat Senators who voted against gun control legislation last month. It appears that Mikey the First is going after Senators who actually listen to their constituents instead of kowtowing to the President and his ilk. How horrible that Senators should legislate in a manner which reflects the views and wishes of the voters. What comes next, women getting the vote? These dimwits would have gone after people who voted against internment of Japanese civilians in 1942. Here’s hoping that their efforts are unsuccessful.
- From the “Unpossible” Department – A 16 year old in Chicago was shot and killed by police recently when he rode his bicycle along a city street and randomly fired a pistol at pedestrians. After he shot at police who were chasing him, they shot him in what I will have to call a righteous case of self-defense. How a 16 year old was able to get a pistol in a city and state with some of the most draconian gun control laws in the nation is anyone’s guess. Maybe one of us evil gun nuts slipped into Chicago under cover of darkness, intimidated the young choir boy with our evil mind control powers, and threatened to hurt his saintly mother if he didn’t randomly shoot up a crowd of people. Or maybe Tywon bought the gun from Mookie on the street corner and decided to show how much a man he was by shooting at a bunch of defenseless strangers for the fun of it. Mookie, of course, could have gotten the gun from a number of sources, including theft or commerce with other criminals. All that can really be known about this, at the moment, is that a whole bunch of laws meant to keep guns out of the hands of 16 year old criminals did precisely diddly over squat to keep the pistol out of the hands of this particular 16 year old criminal. Remember kids, gun control is what you do instead of something useful.
- From the “First World Problems” Department – A petty fight between vegans and agricultural students at a high school in California is drawing national attention. Apparently, the plant eaters take issue with the ag students raising and caring for farm animals who are eventually slaughtered for meat. Some are apparently handing out flyers around campus that show the rather gruesome aspects of slaughtering and butchering food animals. Of course, as usually happens in these cases, name calling has begun in earnest, with some calling those of us who recognize that we are, in fact, omnivores “carcass crunchers”. Personally, I prefer to be called “Green Eyed Devil”. I bear no ill will toward the leafchewers. Heck, some of my favorite foods eat nothing but plants. I will, however, point out that growing and processing plant-based food can be just as difficult and icky as slaughtering Stumpy the goat. Haven’t these people ever listened to the screams of wheat stalks as they are harvested and put through a thresher? I always feel horrible as I pluck the cherries off of our trees, knowing how hard the mother cherry tree worked to create and nurture her children. And you only know true sadness when you realize how many stoners had to give up their “wake and bake” so that some farmer could plant industrial hemp instead of Northern California wacky weed so that we could have matching artisanal tee shirts and sandals.
- From the “Slow News Day” Department – An artist recently lifted the spirits of the people of Hong Kong by floating an oversized bath toy into the harbor. Apparently Vincent van Daffy believes that the sight of a large yellow rubber duck in the waters off large cities will make people feel whimsical and childlike. He plans to bring his travelling tubby-time exposition to the United States, but does not know exactly where. I will alert Weer’d so that he can start lobbying now.
Posted by daddybear71 on May 7, 2013
https://daddybearsden.com/2013/05/07/news-roundup-188/
Today’s Earworm
This one is for all of y’all who went to Houston for the NRA Annual Meeting and now have to drag your tired selves back to the real world. I feel for you, because I’ve been there. Don’t worry, 2014 is coming.
Posted by daddybear71 on May 7, 2013
https://daddybearsden.com/2013/05/07/todays-earworm-358/
Thoughts on the Day
- In some circumstances, “Just one more thing” is a good phrase to hear on a Monday morning.
- Today wasn’t it.
- I was going to write “Break it all over again” as my back-out plan for something I was trying to fix at work, but my better judgement won out in the end.
- A couple of years ago, when I got re-certified in CPR, I was told to only give compressions.
- I had always been taught some variation on “Two breaths, compressions for x repetitions, then two breaths.”
- I figured they were the experts, so whatever.
- Today I got recertified, and they are back to breaths and compressions, if you feel comfortable giving breaths.
- Didn’t know that proper technique came down to a mood.
- The first aid instructor was talking about tourniquets because of their use after the Boston Marathon bombing. That kind of surprised me, but shouldn’t have.
- Most of our first aid class involved lecture and scenarios presented by DVD. If anything ever screamed out “computer based training followed by an hour or so of Q&A”, this is it.
- The first man to come up with a non-toxic, non-itchy attic insulation will be a billionaire in about 15 minutes.
- I’ve reached the point where it makes more sense to throw extra building supplies in the garage than it does to take them back for a refund.
- They’ll get used eventually, so why waste the gas?
- Irish Woman seems to be having trouble being on a conference call from home when the dog is barking and whining at the cat and the cat is hissing and spitting and yowling at the dog.
- I will have to work with her on her multitasking.
- I am proud of myself. When someone I know was whining about us not getting more involved in Syria, I didn’t call them a twit.
- I did, however, tell them that only a damn fool would get involved in a civil war between two groups that dislike us.
- I mean, I can’t be all sweetness and light. I have a reputation to protect.
Posted by daddybear71 on May 6, 2013
https://daddybearsden.com/2013/05/06/thoughts-on-the-day-126/
DaddyBear
DaddyBear’s Den 