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  • The other night, I was reminded that the little switch on the side of the stand mixer goes backward to shut off the mixer, and forward to turn it all the way up.
    • I just wanted to make another pumpkin pie.  I ended up a pumpkin spice Norwegian.
    • The passage of time slowed to a crawl when I heard that little motor start to wind up.  I swear, I could see each and every droplet as it exited the mixer.
    • Irish Woman, being the calm and supportive wife that she is, called out to make sure that my string of profanity was not due to an injury, then showed her intelligence by staying in the other room until after I’d cleaned up and gotten a shower.
    • There was one part of the kitchen that wasn’t painted orange: the hole in the splatter pattern shaped like a fat man leaning over a mixer.
  • The married man’s quandary:
    • Does he just sweep and vacuum the living room rug and light a few candles so that his wife can feel that he’s pulling his weight while she runs their offspring to school?
      • or
    • Does he tell his wife that he did it because the dog got into the garbage can while he was in the shower and he didn’t want her to come home to THAT mess on the living room rug?
  • The Big Brown Truck of Happiness came up our driveway at 9:30 this evening, and the dogs didn’t lift their heads from their beds.  Either they’re really used to this guy, or they had a really hard day.
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  1. John in Philly

     /  November 30, 2017

    “…the hole in the splatter pattern..” Good thing I had finished the coffee!


  2. suz

     /  November 30, 2017

    The answer to your quandary is definitely the second choice.


  3. Yep, second one…


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