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Musings

  • You know, for a guy who makes his living dealing with technology, I’m really starting to hate technology.
    • No, that’s OK, mister work phone, please spontaneously reboot and reset yourself to factory settings.
    • Of course, miss laptop screen, it’s perfectly fine for you to start having fuzzy weird digital ghosts at odd moments while I’m scrolling around.
    • Oh, no, please, excuse me, mister TV remote.  It’s entirely my fault that you have decided that you will only work at angles ranging from 0 to 15 degrees from center of the television screen.
  • The peanut butter eggs in the white wrappers are not, in fact, ‘diet’ peanut butter eggs.
    • I stand corrected.
  • I can wait another week or two for the movie I ordered to arrive because Amazon has it on backorder, or I can cancel that order and go to the local Big Box Retail Cooperative and buy a copy there.
    • The downside of waiting is, well, waiting.
    • The downside of buying local is that I’ll have to go to Big Box Retail Cooperative and deal with, shudder, people.
    • Oh, well, movie’ll get here when it gets here.
  • One advantage of working from home a couple days a week is that my lunches are of higher quality.
    • You see, when I take my lunch to work, I usually just have leftovers microwaved on a paper plate.
    • When I’m at home, I can get fancy and use an actual dish to heat up my leftovers.  Perhaps I can even use real silverware.
    • Not only that, but I can have tap water cooled in my very own refrigerator.  At work, I have tap water that’s cooled with ice chunks like a peasant.
  • Apparently, “‘Tear down the flood walls, bulldoze it flat, and salt the earth with radium” was not the answer the young lady with the clipboard was looking for when she asked me what I thought the mayor could do to make Louisville better.
    • When that answer seemed to confuse her, I told her to just put down that I thought we ought to hire more teachers.
  • I saw an ad the other night for a company called ‘Dads Heating and Cooling’. I imagine their service calls involve a lot of demands for you to get out of their light and to fetch them the 3/8’s.

3 Comments

  1. “Oh, no, please, excuse me, mister TV remote. It’s entirely my fault that you have decided that you will only work at angles ranging from 0 to 15 degrees from center of the television screen.”

    Maybe you’ve already thought of this, but my experience has been that nine times out of ten, if the remote seems to be acting wonky, it needs new batteries.

  2. suz

     /  April 21, 2017

    +1 espschofield. Our remotes do the same thing when they need new batteries.

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