In between work work, housework, family, writing, and collapsing into unconsciousness for a few hours each day, I’ve been watching the television show ‘The Tudors.’  It’s a wonderful romp telling the story of the court of King Henry VIII of England as he marries, beheads, eats, and tantrums his way through the Reformation.

I have a few observations:

• If your system of government is based on near absolute monarchy with patrilineal succession, it is good to have an heir and a spare.
  • Just make sure your ‘spare’ isn’t a self-indulgent prat with a rather bloody mind and absolutely no managerial skills.  You never know when you’ll have to pull his sorry butt out of the trunk and bolt him to the Ford Anglia of state.
• A lot of problems could have been avoided if King Henry had listened to that old adage, “Thou shalt not date thy brother’s ex.”
• A lot more would have been avoided if King Henry had ever uttered the words, “Well, I suppose we should just find Mary a good husband to run the country with her.”
• You should not repeatedly use the team of women who take care of your wife as your personal dating pool.
• If your mistress was easy to get into bed and eager to break up your marriage, don’t be surprised if she doesn’t change her ways after you put a ring on her finger.
• If you start executing your friends, don’t be surprised when you don’t have many left.
• Pro tip – Do not commit to marriage without at least meeting your future spouse. That is, unless you’re a good man who will stand by his oaths no matter what, but let’s not get silly.
• Sixteen year old girls don’t accidentally learn how to seduce middle-aged kings.
• If sleeping around on your husband can lead to you getting shorter by a head, I suggest ice cream and female-centric entertainment to fill your lonely nights.
• If sleeping with somebody’s wife is likely to lead to you being tortured to death, after weeks of torture, with a side of torture to go with it, then maybe you ought to volunteer for overseas service.
• If you don’t let people proclaim their beliefs and disagreements in public, they will whisper them in secret.