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  • There’s nothing like finding a pair of hot 120v wires with nothing but 20 year old masking tape covering their bare ends to make you think good thoughts about the previous owners of your home.
  • Dear custom counter top makers – The time to learn that you are contractually restricted from selling a certain countertop to a store, and through them, to me, is not two and a half weeks after I shelled out my hard earned money for them, and two and a half weeks before I am planning on having people over to the house.
    • The home supply center did right by us, and we should have countertops within the next fourteen days.
    • Luckily, the nice lady we worked with took the “We are so sorry, and we will make this right” approach with us, and not the “We already have your money, so what are you going to do?” approach.
  • Dear Vendor – If you ever create another interface that makes me hit “OK” 6,052 times to change the date every element in a dataset ages out and gets deleted, I am going to hunt you down, gut you like a trout, and use your entrails to string a bass violin.
    • I am not exaggerating, on either the number of “OK”s, or the consequences..
  • Dear Mother Nature – Please pick a temperature and a barometric pressure.  I don’t mean to complain, but I’m beginning to have the posture and personality of a honey badger.
  • I have several restaurant reviews for those of you coming into town for the NRAAM.  Look for them to get done when I’m not exhausted, pissed off, and/or under the weather.
  • Why do I get the same feeling down the center of my spine when Irish Woman says “Don’t get me anything for Mother’s Day” as I did when the guy four feet from me in Bosnia stepped on something and it went “CLICK!”?

1 Comment

  1. jon spencer

     /  May 6, 2016

    So, what are you getting her?


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