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It has just been announced the Brian Williams, anchorman of NBC’s Nightly News program, has been suspended without pay for six months.  It would seem that Mr. Williams may have… exaggerated a tad when he discussed such things as his exploits in Iraq in 2003 or New Orleans in 2005.

I would crow a bit about this, but I can’t.   Yes, a liberal shill has been pulled down from his alabaster pedestal and publicly shamed, but to be honest, there but for the grace of God go I.

You see, I have some confessions to make, and I hope that you all will forgive me.

Deep breath.

Here goes.

  1. I was not Custer’s S-2.
  2. I did not help build the Mayflower, nor did they make me row on the way over.
  3. I do not have three combat jump stars on my jump wings.  In fact, I don’t even have jump wings.
  4. I never went down to the crossroads to learn how to play the guitar.
  5. My role in the burning and sacking of Lindesfarne might have been exaggerated in later reports.
  6. I do not have a license to kill.  I do not even have a license to annoy.
  7. I never killed a man just to watch him die.
  8. I do not have a dream.  Well, actually, I do, but it’s not one I can share in polite company.
  9. I cannot, actually, bring home the bacon and fry it up in the pan.
  10. I am not the reason we cannot have nice things.  Well, not the only reason.

Like I said, I hope you all can forgive me.


  1. Erin

     /  February 10, 2015

    What do you mean you can’t bring home bacon?!?

  2. I was not the second gunman on the grassy knoll.

  3. ZerCool

     /  February 11, 2015

    However, you are indeed guilty of having a milkshake that brings all the boys to the yard.

  4. What about Batman? Are you Batman?

  5. Steve

     /  February 11, 2015

    Whoa, whoa, whoa, number 6 hold on right there….I thought I saw on line 17 of that marriage license that I could annoy till the cows came home….now I’m gonna have to find that piece of paper agin jus ta prove ya wrong!

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