DaddyBear the Minivandian settled into his throne, a flagon of cold ale in his hand, to watch the gladiatorial match between the Beasts of the City of Winds and the Young Herders of the city of the Lone Star.  His day had been long and grueling, and he wished to finish it and rest.  As he considered the merits of both hordes, his mate, the Lady of Eire, came unto him.

“My love,” she purred, “the mage who instructs our son, the Young Prince, at the temple of learning, hath sent with him a scroll of questioning.  He wishes to know how we perceive our son’s progress.  Please, give unto me your undivided attention so that we may give this matter our full effort.”

With a sigh, the Minivandian muttered the spell to dismiss the images upon the box of talking heads, put down his flagon of ale, and took up a quill to fill out the answers as he and his wife read the questions.

• Question – Can thine child count unto twenty, without the aid of his toes?
  • Answer – Yes, but occasionally he shall lose his way and begin to count backwards into the evil region where numbers are less than zero, and then his toes start to disappear until he counts forwards again.
• Question – Hast thine child an imaginary friend?
  • Answer – Yes, if thou shalt count the demon he summoned in the cellar last Candlemas, which yet still lurks in the darkness.
• Question – Dost thine child enjoy having a tome read aloud to him?
  • Answer – Yes.  He especially enjoys hearing passages from the grimoire he found buried in our courtyard.
• Question – Doth thine child enjoy playing with his pets?
  • Answer – Yes.  He hath trained our hounds to defend him while he rests.  However, the cats become as if possessed with a foul spirit when he enters the room.
• Question – Dost thine child try to hurt other people?
  • Answer – Yes, but the neighborhood is a better place now that those orcish children no longer walk the earth.

Upon finishing these questions and others, the Minivandian and the Lady of Eire found a page with activities the Young Prince was to perform.  My lord DaddyBear called his son to his chamber of entertainment, so that he could fulfill the instructions of the master mage of learning.

First, the Young Prince was asked to describe his pet dragon.  With a lilting voice that reminded the Minivandian of the accent of his mother’s ancestors, the Prince described the glittering of its scales, the heat of its breath, and the sharpness of its teeth and claws.  DaddyBear marked upon the scroll the success of this endeavor.  The Minivandian made a mental note to take the drake to the master of beasts for a check-up and claw-clipping.

Next, the Young Prince was asked to stand upon one leg for a time.  At first, the Young Prince was confused about what was being asked, but eventually found the correct way to accomplish this.  Pleased by the praise heaped upon him by the Lady of Eire, he smiled and pulled up his other leg and hung in the air until his father told him to put his feet back upon the ground.

Last, the Young Prince was tested on his ability to handle quill and paper.  As the Lady of Eire told him to make different runes, the Young Prince marked the scroll.  As he made the last mark, a clap of thunder shook the manor of the Minivandian.  A cold wind blew down through the chimney, and the scroll of questions burst into flames.

Bellowing a counter curse, my lord DaddyBear used his mighty hand to smother the flames before they could consume the entire scroll.  Looking down upon the paper, the countenance of a mighty balrog, its head wreathed in flame, looked back at him.

“Minivandian!  I pledge that I shall never bother your realm again, so long as you pledge to place upon this young terror a leash!  He hath called upon me four times this fortnight alone!  Even I, a creature who relishes the suffering of your race, have no wish to be ripped across the threshold between our realms so often!”

Nodding his agreement, the Minivandian finished patting out the smoldering remnants of the page.  A smell of burning parchment and brimstone hung in the air.  After ensuring that the hellfire produced by his son had been extinguished, he fixed upon him a baleful glare.

“Princeling!  Harken unto me!  From this moment forward, I forbid you to summon unto this realm any creature, be it of flesh or fire or spirit, without my permission.  You shall only do this when I, or your mother, or the mage of learning instruct you to do so, and then only in a manner that keeps the creature within a place of safety.  Dost thou understand?”  rumbled the Minivandian, trying to look as stern and fierce as he could.

“Aye, father, I do.” chirped the Young Prince.  “I shall refrain from summoning such creatures.  Such a task has become childs play to me.  May I begin to learn to tame the beasts of the forest and of the fen and of the mountain crag instead?”

“Yes, my son, you may.  Just remember to not bring them into your mother’s house until she has told you that she will allow it.” answered DaddyBear. “You are too young to remember the trouble your sister got into when she brought a small creature, foul of countenance and aroma, into the house on the day of Thanksgiving.  I would wish that you not have to endure the trial of your mother’s tears and wrath.”

The Young Prince skipped off to inquire of his sister, Listens to Stories, as to where he might find such a creature.   The Lady of Eire scooped up the charred scroll, placed her hand upon the Minivandian’s shoulder, and then left to renew the spells of warding which she had placed upon the manor after the incident with the basilisk.

DaddyBear uttered the spell to energize the box of talking heads, finding that he still had much of the match of gladiators to enjoy.  His flagon of beer in hand, he settled back.  While he watched the mighty titans clash against each other, he thought of the terror that had sprung from his loins and was at that very moment plotting to do something that was probably quite offensive and sticky.  After much thought, he realized that the boy took after his father, and his father, and his father before him.  Such a tradition was honorable, and a smile broke across his face as he recalled the trouble he had gotten when his grandmother had discovered his own pet dragon.  Such memories are what make life worth living, and DaddyBear hoped that his progeny would also have such things to reflect upon when his own children tried to burn down the family abode.

The Young Prince did indeed learn to tame the beasts of the forest and of the fen and of the mountain crag.  Many times did the Lady of Eire have to mutter strong spells to drive off these beasts, who occasionally lost their tameness once they were no longer in the grasp of the Young Prince.  The Minivandian grew happy as he watched the young barbarian grow, and in so doing, he knew that the honor of his family would continue with the next generation.