It’s true what they say: Cops and women don’t mix. It’s like eating a spoonful of Drano; sure, it’ll clean you out, but it’ll leave you hollow inside. — The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!

 

Rule number one, as one of my first leaders in the Army told me, is to not be stupid.  If only I’d listened to that advice.  Rushing into a relationship, especially one that rapidly involves children, is almost as dumb as grabbing something randomly from under the kitchen sink and taking a swig.  If someone is giving you a time limit or making an ultimatum, that’s a good hint that maybe they’re not the one for you.  If it’s worth spending the rest of your life with them, it’s worth taking an extra year or two to make sure.

Oh, that’s what everyone thinks! But kind people find out that they are cruel. Brave men discover that they are really cowards! Confronted by their true selves, most men run away screaming! — The NeverEnding Story

My harshest critic always seems to be me.  Every so often, I’ll remember something cruel or stupid that I did decades ago, and feel shame about it.  In the moments where I’m falling asleep, it’s not unusual for the day to play over in my head and I see all of the awful things I’ve done.  Every decision I make, every word I speak, every thought I have, I roll over and over until I’m sure I’m a horrid human being.

Luckily, that’s not how it is every day.  Yes, I need to be introspective, examine my motives, my behavior, and my beliefs, but I also need to see the good with the bad.  It’s a very dark place to sit when all you see is the evil that you do, and I never want to go back there.

You don’t like my plan? That’s good. Give me a another plan, but don’t tell me we’re backing out! — Volcano

I’ve never claimed to be omniscient, and I’m rarely the smartest guy in the room.  But don’t criticize my way of doing things unless you have a better idea.  I’ll listen to constructive criticism.  Whining, on the other hand, along with its cousin Paralysis, gains you nothing but derision.

My dear, never confuse efficiency with a liver complaint. — Mary Poppins

I don’t have a “resting bitch face”.  I have a “I’m tired and I’m ready to be left alone for a while” face.  Some take this as being unfriendly.  I take it as giving fair warning.

That being said, if I’m sitting there, looking like I don’t want to be messed with, and you have the manners to talk to me politely, it’s pretty good odds that I’ll break a smile, ask you to sit down, and enjoy some time with you.  Heck, if you’re at the house, I might feed you.  I just don’t advertise that service to the general public.

Of course, if I have that face, I’m backed into a corner, and I’m just staring at my cup or my food, it means I’m exhausted and really want to be left alone.  I can’t promise what happens then, but I do try to be at least polite.

Well, thank you very much! Can I be in charge for a while?  — Full Metal Jacket

One of the harshest lessons I ever learned is to know when I am in charge and when I am not.  It’s a skill I needed.  Some leaders want input, some don’t.  Some who do are territorial about their prerogatives, while others want their subordinates to come to the same decision as they have.  All were good leaders, but all had a different method.

That being said, the best people I ever worked for were capable of doing any of these things, and tailored their style to the particular person with whom they were dealing.  Knowing when to be a hardass, when to get input from subordinates, and when to let them run free to get to a goal is the best leadership skill, and it’s one that can only come from working for good leaders.