- From the “Pistols for the Privates” Department – Smith and Wesson has teamed up with General Dynamics to compete for the contract to manufacture the next-generation sidearm for the United States military. Currently, the standard military pistol is the M-9 family of 9mm handguns from Beretta, but that design has been in use for almost 30 years, and a lot of improvement in handguns has occurred since then. Smith and Wesson brings over 150 years of experience in making quality firearms to the table, while General Dynamics brings decades of knowing which politicians to groom, where to put the factories, and how to work government contracts. This new effort is, of course, bringing up the 9mm versus .45 debate, the pistol versus short-barreled carbine debate, and the John Moses Browning, PBUH, versus everyone else in the history of firearms, past, present, and future, debate.
- From the “Pot Meets Kettle” Department – Kim Jong Un, North Korean dictator and author of the Hangul best seller “Fat, Frisky, and Ferocious: A DPRK Love Story”, has called Americans “cannibals and brutal murderers seeking pleasure in slaughter” while visiting a museum dedicated to a supposed massacre of Korean civilians during the Korean War. The Glorious Leader made the statement while seated on a throne made from the bones of North Korean peasants. Afterward, he treated himself to a lunch comprised completely with food grown by the prisoners of his extensive penal colonies, with the highlight being a soup made from the tears of the generations of North Korean children who will be stunted by repression and starvation. In related news, North Koreans are not allowed to name their children “Kim Jong Un”, or to use the name of his father or grandfather. Those who already have the name are being ‘asked’ to change it. My sources report that the top name chosen by those who change their name is “Slave”.
- From the “Secret Lairs” Department – A video taken outside of a Google office in London purports to show a “beam of static electricity” emanating from the facility. The video shows the hair on one man’s head raising on its own, and includes audio and video static before cutting out. A Google representative, Zorgon the Horrific, responded that the video is a fake, all is well, and we should pay no attention to the gnomes that have been seen digging up the sidewalk in front of the
fortresscomplex. - From the “First You Say It” Department – Authorities in London are replacing a pane of glass on the new see-through section of a bridge after it shattered. It appears that someone dropped a glass beer bottle on it, then someone walked across it in high heels. There was no real danger, since this was only one layer of five, but the pucker factor in central London that night was reported to have been elevated to 11.
- From the “Nobody Rides for Free” Department – Russian authorities are investigating after video of airline passengers helping to push their plane after it became frozen to the ground. Local conditions included a temperature of -61 F. For those of you who live in balmy Minnesota, that’s cold enough to have to put on two pairs of long johns and your snowmobile suit. Apparently the passengers weren’t too worried about any damage their efforts could do to the airplane, but then again, they were flying in a TU-134, so problems with equipment aren’t at the top of their concerns.
- From the “Nothing to See Here” Department – Hey, kids, guess how much it costs to become ambassador to Hungary! If you said almost $3 million in direct and bundled donations to President Obama’s electoral war chest, you win a cookie! Apparently that, along with being the producer for a soap opera, qualifies you to be the chief representative to an ally in a region that is heating up. In related news, not being able to speak Spanish, nor ever visiting Argentina, does not disqualify you from being our ambassador to that nation. Now why would we want to send qualified diplomats to places like that? It’s not like anything important could happen there, now could it?
- From the “Two Americas” Department – Police in St. Louis are refusing to describe the alleged murder of a Bosnian immigrant by four black teenagers as a hate crime. Rather they characterize it as a “crime of opportunity”, even though the group is alleged to have attacked another Bosnian immigrant earlier that evening. No word yet from Al Sharpton, President Obama, or Attorney General Holder.
- From the “Darwin” Department – A recent study has concluded that ridden toys, such as scooters and miniature electric vehicles, are the most dangerous toys on the market. Next runner-up on the list were toys that can be a choking hazard to babies and toddlers. Is this where I point out that the best Christmas present I ever got was a wood burning tool, and that I remember epic Jarts games at my grandmother’s home?
- From the “Catch 22” Department – The IRS has responded to a request for any communications between the IRS and the White House about the tax returns of political opponents by acknowledging that such documents exist, but cannot be disclosed because they contain private information. So, basically, the IRS cannot disclose what private information was communicated between the IRS and the Obama administration, which may constitute a crime, because to do so would expose the private information and break the law. And people wonder why the approval rating for the government in general, and the White House in particular, is so low.
News Roundup
Posted by daddybear71 on December 3, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/12/03/news-roundup-236/
Movie Quotes – Day 337
I do seem to remember a process where you people ask me questions and I give you answers, and then I ask you questions and you give me answers, and that’s the way we find out things. I think I read that in a manual somewhere. — 2010
There has to be a dialogue, and it has to be a two-way conversation. If the other side is refusing to talk to you, you are wasting your breath. If all you’re doing is talking at them, you’re doing the same thing. If you’re both blasting the other with rhetoric, histrionics, or just plain anger, then both of you need to go to a neutral corner for a while.
Posted by daddybear71 on December 3, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/12/03/movie-quotes-day-337/
Movie Quotes – Day 336
Therefore, you will… NARFTLE THE GARTHOK! — Coneheads
My least liked thing to hear at work is “You have an opportunity to excel.” This is followed closely by “Do you have a few moments?”. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy a challenge, and it means something that I’m asked to take on more and more challenging work. But just once, I’d like for these opportunities to not happen on a Friday afternoon.
Posted by daddybear71 on December 2, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/12/02/movie-quotes-day-336/
Movie Quotes – Day 335
A man should be what he can do. — From Here to Eternity
At some point, I went from saying “I’m in the Army” to saying “I’m a soldier.” At some point, I stopped saying “We have kids” to saying “We’re parents.” Once you internalize what you do to the point that it’s a part of what you are, you’ve truly bought into it, and you start to become truly adept at it.
Posted by daddybear71 on December 2, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/12/02/movie-quotes-day-335/
Musings
- Telling the kids and dogs to “Make a hole and make it wide” so that Irish Woman could get through the dining room might not have been the smartest thing I’ve ever done as a husband.
- Saying “Baby, you got the whole stack of Marshalls” when your darling wife is singing “I Got That Bass” might not come across as a compliment, no matter how you meant it.
- I watched the trailer for the new Star Wars movie this weekend.
- Meh.
- Maybe I’m jaded, or maybe I’m just not unhooking my brain enough, but did it occur to anyone else how fantastically wrong it is to have a tramp space freighter like the Millennium Falcon taking part in a dogfight in a planet’s atmosphere.
- I made the mistake in reading some of the reaction to the trailer, and apparently there are a few people who have some heartburn about a black actor in a storm trooper uniform. Then I made the mistake of reading the comments of those who reacted to those with heartburn, then the counter-reaction, then the counter-counter-reaction, then I remembered why I pretty much left Star Trek/Star Wars/Battlestar Galactica/Firefly/Whatever fandom in the first place.
- Christmas hymns are always better in the original German.
- Girlie Bear read from the book of Isaiah in German at a special service tonight. She did better than I could have at that age.
- Note to self – Do research about the culture and history of the place you’re basing your fictional story upon before you start writing. Nothing like having to go back and rewrite everything because you weren’t even close.
- Every so often, I have one of those days where I’m not fit for human consumption. Today, the devil himself would have barred the door and called the police if I’d come knocking.
Posted by daddybear71 on November 30, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/11/30/musings-97/
Movie Quotes – Day 334
I don’t mind a reasonable amount of trouble. — The Maltese Falcon
Life doesn’t have to be easy, it just has to be possible. Hard work does not frighten me, but pointless labor is infuriating. Asking me to do things that facilitate getting things done is reasonable, but I can become quite unreasonable when bureaucratic crap is thrown at me.
Posted by daddybear71 on November 30, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/11/30/movie-quotes-day-334/
Movie Quotes – Day 333
Thetis: So many women, and all these transformations and disguises he invents in order to seduce them. Sometimes a shower of gold, sometimes a bull or a swan. Why, once he even tried to ravish me disguised as a cuttlefish.
Hera: Did he succeed?
Thetis: Certainly not.
Athena: What did you do?
Thetis: Beat him at his own game. I simply turned myself into a shark.
— Clash of the Titans
Women will rarely be able to resist a man on his terms. Fair fights are for tournaments and boxing rings. Fight dirty, and fight hard. Use whatever tools you have at your disposal, but never give up the fight.
Posted by daddybear71 on November 29, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/11/29/movie-quotes-day-333/
Musings
- This morning, as I ate a cookie one of our friends, who is of Lebanese descent, made for us, I told Irish Woman that I would give her a girl child if she got the recipe, and that shewas authorized to offer Boo in exchange for it.
- I will get this recipe, and if I’m allowed, I’ll post the recipe.
- My turkey turned out to be very juicy, and my gravy was highly praised. I’ll call that a win.
- I consider it a good meal if everyone eats in silence because talking would take away from the food.
- It would appear that Bluegrass and Moonshine have accepted Derby. I was woken this morning by Moonie and Derby practicing their kung-fu in the hallway. Derby can hold her own with Moonshine, but Bluegrass only let her play for a moment before showing her teeth and reminding her who was the head female in this particular pack. Of course, 20 minutes later, all three were in a pile taking a nap in a sunbeam.
- Boo is definitely my son. I had to drag him back in the house to put on socks, shoes, and a jacket heavier than a sweatshirt this morning.
- I didn’t think I’d be doing any scripting tonight, but as fate would have it, I got to resurrect something I wrote in 2009, polish it a bit, and reuse it.
- I was forced to do something I’ve never done before, which caused me to learn something tonight. Can’t let that continue. Next thing you know, I’ll be learning, and improving, and growing, and we can’t have that.
Posted by daddybear71 on November 28, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/11/28/musings-96/
Movie Quotes – Day 332
Are you a good witch, or a bad witch? — The Wizard of Oz
Pick a side. You are either on the side of freedom, or you serve the side of tyranny. Either way, the time to show your colors is long past.
Posted by daddybear71 on November 28, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/11/28/movie-quotes-day-332/
Heads Up
Brigid is donating all proceeds she makes from her book, “The Book of Barkley” to animal rescue organizations, and she’s found a really good one:
Please take a moment and click on these words: Peanut’s Promise.
This group, up in the Windy City, not far from where we live, is doing incredible things, their latest project–rescuing Labrador Retrievers who have lived solely to breed purebred puppies, with bad food, harsh elements outside 24/7, little, if any medical care, and no love or affection. Some had no more than a depression on the ground to sleep in. When they get sick, or old, or barren, they are discarded. In this case the breeder is giving them up, a blessing for them, but a lot of work for the volunteers with that many dogs, all neglected, coming in at once. I am just one tiny little part of that effort, but I wanted to help and spread the word.
Because it broke my heart to see it.
Because every Lab should have a home where he’s a family member, as loved as the two-legged ones.
She’s put TBOB on special until Christmas, so if you haven’t read it, now’s a good time to get a good book and do some good work.
Posted by daddybear71 on November 27, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/11/27/heads-up-5/
DaddyBear
DaddyBear’s Den 