You say you hate Washington’s Birthday or Thanksgiving and nobody cares, but you say you hate Christmas and people treat you like you’re a leper. — Gremlins

You know, admitting to friends and family that I dislike the Christmas season is usually more jarring than telling anti-gun in-laws that I have a pistol on my belt.  Even complete strangers seem aghast that I don’t walk around wrapped in tinsel and singing old Burl Ives ditties.

Please, enjoy your holiday, but leave me out of it.  We’ll all be happier that way.

Private George E. Elliott: [Telephone conversation from the radar station to the Information Center]

Private George E. Elliott: Sir, this is Private Elliott at Opana Point. There’s a large formation of planes coming in from the north – 140 miles, 3 degrees east.

Lieutenant Kermit A. Tyler: Yeah? Well… Don’t worry about it.

Lieutenant Kermit A. Tyler: [Click!]

— Tora, Tora, Tora

There is a fine line between believing everything that comes down the pipe and disregarding something important.  A professional knows what is normal, and what is not.  Having your eyes open and your head on a swivel means nothing if you disregard the warning signs.

Oh, Christmas isn’t just a day, it’s a frame of mind… and that’s what’s been changing. — Miracle on 34th Street

If you’ve been hanging around here for more than a few months, you’re probably aware that I’m not a Christmas person. The religious aspect of the holiday is a good reminder for me, and I do enjoy the time I get to spend with the kids and Irish Woman.  But Santa Claus, tinsel in every available nook and cranny, and all the noise, noise, noise, noise, noise makes me want to drive my truck into a railroad abutment. It’s getting out of hand.  One of our local radio stations went to pre-programmed Christmas music before Halloween this year, which means that it joins the one that went over prior to Thanksgiving last year on the list of things I don’t listen to anymore.

Look, if you truly feel that there should be peace on earth and good will toward men, then act like it after December 26.  If you want a couple of weeks of good behavior under your belt to salve your conscience for being an absolute prat all year long, go for it.  But at least have the integrity to admit that Christmas is an excuse to shop, and not a state of mind.

A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men. — Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory

I’ll admit it, I’m a goof.  My sense of humor can be called dark at times, but I’ve never heard it called high-brow.  Letting go of your maturity and letting loose with a good laugh does wonders.  More people ought to try it.

I do seem to remember a process where you people ask me questions and I give you answers, and then I ask you questions and you give me answers, and that’s the way we find out things. I think I read that in a manual somewhere. — 2010

There has to be a dialogue, and it has to be a two-way conversation.  If the other side is refusing to talk to you, you are wasting your breath.  If all you’re doing is talking at them, you’re doing the same thing.  If you’re both blasting the other with rhetoric, histrionics, or just plain anger, then both of you need to go to a neutral corner for a while.

Therefore, you will… NARFTLE THE GARTHOK! — Coneheads

My least liked thing to hear at work is “You have an opportunity to excel.”  This is followed closely by “Do you have a few moments?”.  Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy a challenge, and it means something that I’m asked to take on more and more challenging work.  But just once, I’d like for these opportunities to not happen on a Friday afternoon.

A man should be what he can do. — From Here to Eternity

At some point, I went from saying “I’m in the Army” to saying “I’m a soldier.”  At some point, I stopped saying “We have kids” to saying “We’re parents.”  Once you internalize what you do to the point that it’s a part of what you are, you’ve truly bought into it, and you start to become truly adept at it.

I don’t mind a reasonable amount of trouble. — The Maltese Falcon

Life doesn’t have to be easy, it just has to be possible.  Hard work does not frighten me, but pointless labor is infuriating.  Asking me to do things that facilitate getting things done is reasonable, but I can become quite unreasonable when bureaucratic crap is thrown at me.

Thetis: So many women, and all these transformations and disguises he invents in order to seduce them. Sometimes a shower of gold, sometimes a bull or a swan. Why, once he even tried to ravish me disguised as a cuttlefish.
Hera: Did he succeed?
Thetis: Certainly not.
Athena: What did you do?
Thetis: Beat him at his own game. I simply turned myself into a shark.
— Clash of the Titans

Women will rarely be able to resist a man on his terms.  Fair fights are for tournaments and boxing rings.  Fight dirty, and fight hard.  Use whatever tools you have at your disposal, but never give up the fight.

Are you a good witch, or a bad witch? — The Wizard of Oz

Pick a side.  You are either on the side of freedom, or you serve the side of tyranny.  Either way, the time to show your colors is long past.