I woke up this morning to an Internet of former immigration law experts who have evolved into law-of-war, constitutional law, and Mid East foreign policy experts. The mind boggles at what these geniuses will be tomorrow.

I need to step up my game. I’m just a guy who used to have some expertise in Eastern European culture and politics, who morphed into the digital equivelent of a car mechanic, but is currently retooling as a Dachshund caretaker and landscaper.

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Spent the weekend watching several schwanz-measuring contests. First, there was the “Who’s the Biggest Geek?” competition, followed by “Who’s Been a Geek Longer?” cagematch. Both of these were eclipsed by “Who Did the Most Cool Stuff When They Were In The Military 20 Years Ago?” scrum.

I did not participate. I was not there to help Heinlein change his typewriter ribbon, nor do I speak multiple non-human languages without a noticable accent. It goes without saying that I was never a Delta Force Scout Sniper Airborne Riverine Space Shuttle Door Gunner.

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Watching friends do well and become leaders in something is wonderful. Watching pricks who used to be dominant in their space become a footnote is almost as good.

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Did I mule a bottle of top-shelf bourbon down to Tennessee for a friend? Yes.

Did I mule two bottles of niche hot sauce down for another friend? Also yes.

Am I muling seveal bottles of Tennessee whiskey up to Kentucky? Most definitely, but I have to figure out how to not let Irish Woman find out about them.

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Quote of the weekend – I dress like this because it pisses other people off.

I hope to achieve that mindset someday.

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Note to self – When faced with the choice of having hippy-dippy pizza in a brewpub or having upscale steak and seafood for dinner, get a brown ale and a slice.

I want credit for not asking the waiter at the steak-and-alcohol restaurant whether the filet and ravioli plate was prepared by imported Peruvian sasquatch hunters and served by Miss Tennessee 2014 for the price he wanted. They did have an impressive choice of bourbon, though.

I also want to point out that it is hard to blend into a crowd of twenty-somethings who can’t afford what they’re ordering, salted liberally with older folks who are only there because the female in the relationship wants to be seen at a trendy place frequented by younger women, when you’re the only dude who’s sitting alone, wearing a colorful hawaiian shirt, and reading a novel.

Blending in in that environment would have required me to drain one highball glass after another, while wearing tan pants and a pastel shirt, and sitting across from a pile of mutton dressed as lamb. Now that I think about it, I’m OK with sticking out a bit at the restaurant.

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I think I may have pissed a few people off this weekend by not being ‘chatty’ enough. I’d rather be silent and assumed to be a fool than open my mouth and prove it, but that apparently is frowned upon in some social circles.

Something occurred to me the other night –

Iran is sending over flights of missiles and drones. Some are getting through air defense and detonating at seemingly random places.

Some of those missiles are directed at Jerusalem.

What happens if one of the hits the Dome of the Rock?

I’d say there’s a 50/50 chance that Israel would be blamed, but the Arab street, and the governments of those Arabs, could also turn on Iran with a fury Israel could never bring to bear.

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The Young Prince returned home on Saturday from his first week working with younger scouts at summer camp. He got home on Saturday morning and had to be back on Sunday morning. Just enough time to get a good shower, do laundry, get a couple home-cooked meals, and sleep for about 10 hours.

When he came through the door, his dog lost her everloving mind. Sophie the Faux Dachshund was vocal to the point of hysteria. It only got worse when I told her boy to go get a shower. I had to sit with her and rock her like a newborn with colic.

It’s gonna be really rough when he comes back for a few days, then leaves with his mother to attend a Scout camp in Florida next week.

I may have to either introduce her to bourbon or start imbibing a bit more myself.

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Date night this week was dinner followed by a screening of Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. It’s been rereleased for its 35 year anniversary.

Watching Harrison Ford and Sean Connery play off each other on the big screen was an excellent way to spend two hours and thirty dollars. I even got the commemorative metal Jaws popcorn bucket. That one is 50 years old now, and I missed seeing its rerelease.

The theater was about 3/4 full. It reinforces the belief I wrote about a few weeks ago that Hollywood could do worse than rereleasing older, good movies while they figure out how to make money again.

There’s just something about good story and acting, coupled with practical effects and a John Williams soundtrack, that just works. Is it the best movie ever made? No. Was my enjoyment at least partially enhanced by the nostalgia of remembering watching the first release? Yes.

But it was fun and it was frank about its “The Nazis are bad guys. Let’s root for the good guys” story, and that’s missing from a lot of movies nowadays.

Still not happy that the kid who served us our popcorn had to have the movie explained to him. He’d never seen Last Crusade. That made me sad, and I blame his parents.

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Later today, I’ll be heading up to the Apple store to pick up a new Mini. It’ll replace my MacBook Air, which choked when I tried to open up Microsoft Word and a web browser last week.

Some of my friends complain about the cost of a Mac, and they’re right in that there’s a big outlay for a new piece of hardware.

However, that MacBook is the 2015 model. Even assuming that I haven’t used it much for the past year or so, that’s still almost 10 years of good usage with no issues until it just physically couldn’t handle starting newer versions of software.

In that same timeframe, Irish Woman has had at least two HP laptops, neither of them bargain basement models. I’d say that even if I spent the same amount for both of her laptops as I did for my MacBook, I’m still ahead just because of not having to transfer files and settings over, not to mention having to repurchase/reinstall a plethora of programs, a few times.