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  • If you want to know what it’s like to listen to howler monkeys hoot at each other from one tree to the next, watch kindergarten boys yell to each other from their parents’ cars during morning carpool.
  • When the only thing keeping me from walking away from your business is the $100 deposit I put on something with you, you have a problem.
  • Dear Kentucky and Indiana drivers – If you do not know how to drive or your rusted out shitbox cannot handle the trip across the Ohio River, don’t attempt to drive across the bridge.  Having break downs and accidents on the only bridge for 20 miles tends to cut into everyone else’s day.
  • Goosing my wife and laughing when she squeaked loudly, while in the produce area of SuperDuperMegaMart, was the most romantic thing I’ve done all week.
  • Telling me to “use my words” when I just used a rather complex grammatical construct to tell you something is counterproductive.
  • In related news, cussing under my breath in several Slavic and Germanic languages after being told to “use my words” is also counterproductive.
  • When things are so hectic that you have to share an on-line calendar, hold project planning meetings, and are considering making a Gannt Chart, all for your family activities over a weekend, it’s time to scale things back a tad.
  • Ahhh, the sweet sounds of a home at the end of the day.  The gentle sound of the children sleeping, the snoring of the dogs, the thuds and bangs as Irish Woman re-arranges something in the bedroom, the sound of water running in the kitchen after I turn on the….. wait, water running?
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  1. John in Philly

     /  May 30, 2015

    Water running triggered a memory of testing the main lube oil system in one of the aircraft carrier main spaces late in the SLEP overhaul. I was near the electric lube oil service pump and the pipefitter says, “OK, turn it on.” Then a few seconds later, and in a much higher pitched and much faster paced voice he says, “Turn it off, turn it off.”

    A longer story involves my poor choice of standing under the lube oil overflow goose neck and why I came home from work with all my clothes in a trash bag. (the riggers were kind enough to give me a pair of coveralls, and they were kidding about helping me wash the oil off my back in the shower, I think they were kidding.)

  2. Ah, the sound of water running where there shouldn’t be any. My Lady has, on and off, played around with aquaria of moderate complexity. I have, over thirty years, developed several household rules;

    1) No pretty stands under big tanks. On 55 gallon tank showily going over (that was meant to be slowly, but I like the mistake) while the wrought iron stand gave up the ghost was a sufficiency.

    2) No jury-rigged pump systems. One 200 gallon saltwater tank that decided to empty itself onto the floor at 2 AM was all my nerves had in them.

    3) No hyper-complicated filter systems that require complete disassembly and cleaning out of toxic sludge; somehow the hobbyist is always sick when push comes to shove and, dammit, it ain’t MY fish.

    4) No crabs. They look cute, but they eat everything else.

    If the most romantic thing you’ve done all week is goose your Lady, you owe her (and yourself) some surprise flowers. Cutting them from the garden (if any) is good enough. Or the roadside (we get great bunches of roadside day lilies around here).

    I have my drawbacks as a husband, but I got the “Give her flowers when she doesn’t expect them, and life will be much more pleasant” idea early.

    • Irish Woman has two ponds in the front yard, and I gave up on trying to get in her way on those a long time ago. As long as the water doesn’t go into the basement, I stay out of it.

  3. We use Avocado as a shared calendar and list-maker, although being a cheapskate we use the free app and are limited to 5 lists.

    Only for couples, though, works for us, not sure how you’d micro-manage the kids’ time… 😉

  4. (This coming from the guy that made an Excel spreadsheet of all NRA AM-associated activities…)

  5. Water ungood, goosing the wife? Yeah, you owe her flowers… 🙂

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