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News Roundup

  • From the “And One For the Horse You Rode In On” Department – Michael Moore, the hero who has been responsible for the survival of the American fast food and corn chip industries in these hard economic times, has published his list of New Year’s resolutions.  One of them is to stop saying “I support the troops.”  Apparently, those of us who were either suckered into the military because of patriotism or hard economic times should have known better.  Basically, because he disagrees with the political decisions that have led to us invading Iraq and continuing our work in Afghanistan, he thinks that people who sign up to wear the uniform are part of the problem.  Personally, after looking up what Michael Moore has done to contribute to any solution to any problem in his life and being greatly underwhelmed, I hope that Mr. Moore has a change of heart and goes back to his hobbies of trying to destroy corporations and governments, glorifying communism, and pulling the wings off of rare Amazonian butterflies to season his evening meal.
  • From the “Oopsie!” Department – Police in Florida are looking for the source of several training grenades that have been found in a trashcan at DisneyWorld.  I agree with the police in that they are probably left over from some training or other.  Of course, why grenades are being used in military/police training at DisneyWorld is another question.  Next time I visit the Magic Kingdom, I’ll keep my nose open for the smell of burnt gunpowder, flash-bangs, and riot gas.
  • From the “Back in the USSR” Department – Russian President Putin has declared that Girard Depardeau, French actor and tax refugee, is now a Russian citizen.  Russia has a flat 13% income tax, while France is looking to seize 75% of the income of anyone making more than 1 million euros.  Depardeau recently surrendered his French passport and moved to Belgium.  You know, it’s kind of sad when Russia has a more sane tax structure than liberal western democracies.
  • From the “Sharper Than A Serpent’s Tooth” Department – Two girls in California are in hot water after it was discovered that they drugged one of the girls’ parents so that they could be on the Internet after curfew. In the realm of temper tantrums, this one will go down as about an 8 out of 10.  It’s above getting a tattoo to piss off your father but below the Menendez brothers.  Here’s hoping these young ladies get sent to the judicial woodshed and don’t come back for a long time.
  • From the “Insult to Injury” Department – The state of Delaware, which provided millions of dollars in grants and loans to Fisker to open an auto factory in the state, has spent several hundred thousand dollars in additional funds over the past few months to keep the lights on for Fisker.  If you believe that this money will be repaid, as well as the $21 million in loans previously made by the state, then I have beachside property in Kentucky for you. Apparently, when the Obama administration was picking winners and losers in the green energy market, they picked a lot of losers.  This isn’t schadenfreude, ladies and gentlemen.   The federal government promised Fisker over half a billion dollars, which we’re all on the hook for.  Thankfully, Fisker seems to have crumbled before getting all of that money, so thank the Lord for small favors.
  • From the “Oddities” Department – Doctors in Iran are reporting that a man in Tabriz has grown a benign tumor on the surface of one of his eyes that is apparently sprouting hair.  It is reported that this condition is not uncommon, and I have to agree.  Every father of the girls I used to date gave me the hairy eyeball, so I’m guessing that most of the people so afflicted are middle-aged fathers of teenage daughters.  I expect mine to start emerging any time now.

30 Days of Dickens – Day 30

It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known. — A Tale of Two Cities

My Take – Sydney Carton knew his fate, and went to it with his head high.  Few of us deliberately die for others as he did, but we all do things that are unpleasant or painful for our own good or for the good of others.  The worst moments of my life happened after I looked at myself in the mirror, admitted that what I was about to do would be painful, would last for a very long time, and would stay with me to my grave, but were necessary and I had to get on with it.  Yes, they sucked, and yes I still wince when I think of them, but I’m better off because of them, and I’m glad I went through them.  When those moments come to you, I hope you make the right decision.

An Open Letter to Piers Morgan

Dear Mr. Morgan,

I have seen in the news that a petition has been circulated on the White House website asking that you be deported for your rather vociferous commentary about the right to keep and bear arms, a right which is protected by the 2nd Amendment to our Constitution.  Please do not think that all people who live here believe that those who disagree with us deserve to be punished or sent away.  To me, the 1st Amendment to the Constitution is as necessary and important as the 2nd.  While I disagree with what you say, I truly do believe in your right, citizen or not, to say it.

Of course, I have also seen your article stating that if stringent gun control and curtailment of the right to keep and bear arms are not enacted by our government, that you will ‘self deport’.  Again, this is your right, and if you truly feel that you should not continue to be a guest in our country, I wish you success wherever you end up.

But before you go, let me point out a few things:

  • I won’t assume presume to lecture you on the history of the rights of Englishmen, including the right to arms and self defense.  I will, however, remind you that the founding fathers, including Washington, Jefferson, and Franklin, were born Englishmen, and believed that they had the same  God-given rights as other Englishmen.  The issue that split our country from Great Britain was overwhelmingly the violation of these rights by the British government.  Up until the final split in 1776, they tried to find a way to stay Englishmen.  Paradoxically, they decided that the only way to keep their rights as Englishmen was to declare that they were no longer Englishmen, but were instead Americans.
  • The rights to speak your mind, worship, keep and bear arms, and be treated equally under the law did not originate in Philadelphia in the 18th century.  They have existed in English law and political philosophy since the middle ages.
  • I believe the difference between the way you look at the issue and how I do is fundamentally a difference in where we believe that all rights are created.  To you, a subject of the British realm, all laws and rights flow from the Crown, for good or ill.  Your government may restrict your rights whenever it feels it is necessary to do so.  As a citizen of the United States, all of my rights have always existed and will always exist, with or without my government approving of them.  My government does not have the power to dictate what my rights are, rather it is restricted by the Constitution from abridging them.
  • The fact that British subjects have allowed their rights to be eroded over the past century does not matter to us.  It gives me no pleasure to point this out, but those who have surrendered their rights have no place criticizing those who are willing to fight for theirs.
  • You point out your horror at seeing images from Dunblane and Sandy Hook, and of how seeing pictures of dead children and grieving families has moved you to believe that firearms are the problem.  Allow me, a former soldier who has participated in the exhuming of human remains, including those of small children, from mass graves in Bosnia, and who has visited Dachau and other concentration camps, to disagree.  At numerous places across Europe, Africa, and Asia, there are piles of bone and ash that might not exist had the victims of attrocities had the means and will to resist their captors.  Yes, mass shootings in the United States are attrocities perpetrated by evil men against the innocent and helpless, but disarming potential victims leads almost always to even bigger attrocities.
  • Yes, our Constitution has flaws.  That is why we have gone through the trouble of amending it 27 times.  We recognize that we need to continue to improve our system of government, and have built in mechanisms to do so.  However, this means that if there are those who do not care for the fact that a large portion of Americans believe it is their God-given right to keep and bear arms, then they must amend the Constitution to remove the protections of that right in that document.  Executive whims, legislative bills, and judicial fiat will not do that.  Instead of exhorting anti-rights zealots to try to violate the Constitution, might I suggest that you try to get them to amend the Constitution?

Again, I wish you luck and happiness in whatever country you decide to settle.  I will close with this quote from Samuel Adams, another Englishman who realized that the only way to keep his rights as an Englishman was to become something else:

“If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, go home from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or your arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains set lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen.”

Sincerely,

Daddy J. Bear

Louisville, Kentucky

30 Days of Dickens – Day 29

Once a gentleman, and always a gentleman. — Little Dorrit

My Take – This one is a tough one to get a handle on.  I tend to disagree with it.  While past performance may be an indicator of future activities, you can never tell with human beings.  We are a hard bunch to predict.  That guy who has it all under control with a great wife and kids might throw it all away on a girl half his age and a bad coke habit.  The person you see on the street every day on your walk to your office might be all smiles and “Good Morning!” for years, then one day you get mugged.  The best advice I can give is to always be prepared for the worst, even as you hope for the best.

Today’s Earworm

Overheard in the Hallway

The scene – The hallway in an American suburban residence at approximately 4 AM on New Year’s Day.

Annya, softly pawing at the door to a bedroom – “Hey, open the door please.  I’d like to come in.”

Moonshine – “Hi!  I’m the puppy!”

Annya – “I know.  Leave me alone.”

Moonshine – “Whatcha doing?”

Annya – “I’m trying to get into this bedroom so I can cuddle up with Girlie Bear.  It’s kind of chilly in the house, and I want to warm up.”

Moonshine – “I know!  It’s really chilly tonight!  You know what I do when I get cold?  I run around in circles to warm up!  Like this!”

Annya – “Stop that.  You’re going to wake up the whole house, and we’ll all have to sleep in the basement.”

Moonshine – “Hey!  I can help you!  I’ll get the girl to wake up and open her door so we can both sleep in there.   She has a great rug in there!   I love the way that one corner tastes! HEY!  WAKE UP!  LET US IN!”

Annya, visibly annoyed – “Stop it!  You’re getting us in trouble!  Go away!”

Moonshine – “Well, that didn’t work!  Hey, I know!  Let’s play and then we’ll both get warm!”

Annya – “Look, freak, I said to go away!  Leave me alone!”

Moonshine – “Aw come on!  It’s fun!  Hey, can I play “Catch my tail” with your tail?  It’s lots of fun!”

Annya – “DON’T TOUCH ME!  GET AWAY FROM ME!”

Moonshine – “I got your tail!  I got your tail!”

Annya – “I’LL KILL YOU YOU LITTLE FLOPPY EARED BASTARD!  I’M GONNA CUT YOU FOUR TYPES OF BAD!  LONG, DEEP, WIDE, AND OFTEN!  YOU WANNA DANCE?  LET’S DANCE!”

At this point, I got out of bed, put the dog back in his kennel, and banished Annya to the basement for the rest of the night.  Happy freaking New Year.

30 Days of Dickens – Day 28

“For the matter o’ that, Phil, argeyment is a gift of Natur. If Natur has gifted a man with powers of argeyment, a man has a right to make the best of ’em, and has not a right to stand on false delicacy, and deny that he is so gifted; for that is a turning of his back on Natur, a flouting of her, a slighting of her precious caskets, and a proving of one’s self to be a swine that isn’t worth her scattering pearls before.” — Barnaby Rudge

My Take – We all have talents, and it is right and proper that we use those talents in a way that is constructive.  Maybe your talent is shooting, or instructing, or arguing for your rights.  Maybe it’s cooking or sewing.  Perhaps you’re a born teacher or healer.  No matter what your talent is, never let anyone tell you that it’s wrong for you to exercise and grow it.

The War VI – Musings

I hope you all have enjoyed my thought experiment on Iran, Korea, and Syria over the past few days.  It’s something that’s been rumbling around in my knoggin for a couple of weeks.

I started with the question “How is Iran, after all these years of economic and diplomatic subterfuge, going to make her entrance into the club of nuclear weapon capable nations?”.  I assume that they will eventually do it, and my bones tell me it will be sooner rather than later.  My guess is that they will try to make as big a splash as they can, both for domestic and foreign audiences, so I went with an atmospheric test that could be seen from Tehran.

Of course, that led to the “How do they think they’ll get away with that?” question, which led me to the attacks on civilians in the continental United States.  We are an extremely open and trusting society, especially in suburbia, and if you were trying to knock an administration as sensitive to the domestic situation as this one is back on its heels, then striking at the soccer moms would work very well.

North Korea got mixed up in my scenario because of the reports that Iran is helping North Korea with its missile program, which is now believed to be capable of hitting the United States.  I assume that if you can put an object into orbit, you can either de-orbit it at will or just have the missile and payload do a ballistic arc to a target on the other side of the Pacific.  If Iran was to try to sucker punch us so that we wouldn’t respond to a nuclear test, then I don’t think it’s too hard of a stretch that they’d try to get the North Koreans to make a demonstration that would show that a response to Iran would have dire consequences to us.

I had the North Korean bomb go off over the South Pacific because I didn’t want to get into the debate on the feasibility of a “One Second After” scenario if it went off over the United States or Europe.  Something going off above the ocean to the east of New Zealand would cause a lot of damage, but not so much that I’d have had to write a “We lost the eastern seaboard” scenario.  It’s also where the North Korean satellite was orbiting the day I wrote that section.

As for the reaction of the United States, it took me a long time to decide how the administration would probably react to nuclear detonations on the part of Iran and North Korea.  Would President Obama lash out emotionally and immediately rain nuclear warheads down on both countries?  Would he try to cut a deal that headed off a conflict and basically shrugged our collective shoulders at the situation?  In the end, I decided that he would try to allow diplomatic means to work, but in the end he would bow to pressure and ask for a declaration of war.

How we dealt with North Korea would be, to me, about right for response to a nuclear attack and preparations for another.  How we dealt with Iran in my storyline is how my gut tells me Obama would do it.  Overwhelming force against someone who has used a nuclear weapon against us and our allies and is probably preparing to to it again is not a stretch for the president.  Using overwhelming force, either nuclear or conventional, against Iran, is outside his scope given the scenario I put forth.  While I won’t posit that the president wouldn’t react to the attacks against civilians, I don’t think he has it in him to get the country involved in another mid-East conflict, even if it were wholly justified.

The Syria/Israel thing was an outgrowth of my thought experiment on Iran.  How much havoc would it cause for the United States if Israel was retaliating with overwhelming force against Syrian attacks against its people with chemical weapons?  In my mind, Tehran may have been hoping that Egypt and other Arab states and possibly Turkey would get involved, ripping a huge hole in our mid-east foreign policy and war making ability.

As for the feasibility of our people being hit like that, I don’t think it’s that big a stretch of the imagination.  Like I said, we are an extremely open and trusting society.  Someone who comes here with an accent or a different color of skin is usually at least tolerated, if not welcomed.  An attentive family of middle eastern descent wouldn’t raise an eyebrow when they are picking up their kids after school or shopping at the mall.   I got the idea for how Hezbollah got its people into the country from something that Bryan Suits mentioned on his podcast, and it makes sense.  Hezbollah is indeed almost an arm of the Iranian government, and it is known to be active in Canada and  South America.    As much as people like to scream about how harsh our border policy is, the Mexican border isn’t that much more secure now than it was in 1995 when it was common to find debris and bodies out in the Arizona desert.  The operatives in my story line that came in via Canada are based on how open our country is to immigration.  Yes, legal immigration is difficult, but it can be done of you can get someone with a clean record and nothing but time, especially if they are a doctor or technology specialist.   Openness to immigration has always been a source of our strength, but it could also be used against us if someone thought in terms of years and decades.  Hiding a few thousand terrorists among the thousands of good people who have immigrated here since the early 1980’s wouldn’t be terribly difficult.

I also threw in something that’s been troubling me about our response to al Qaeda.  We’ve concentrated on securing infrastructure for over a decade, but have paid nothing much beyond lip service toward securing the lives of those who use that infrastructure.  Heck, large sections of the government and the media are doing their best to demonize those of us who believe that is our responsibility to provide our own security.   America is a huge, juicy target, and we are basically hanging out there waiting for someone to try again.  I don’t want a police state, but we have to recognize that  continually preparing to defend against another 9/11 is going to leave us eternally open to another Madrid, London, Bali, or Mumbai.  The FBI has made a habit out of enticing morons into trying a terrorist attack, but I haven’t heard anything about efforts to make sure that nation-state sponsored terrorists aren’t taking root here.   We’ve spent 12 years defending against cave-dwellers, but are we ready to deal with the threat that a sovereign nation bent on doing us ill represents?

The Home Guard that I included is something that I believe would be very easy to institute in the wake of both terrorist and nuclear attacks.  It’s been done before, with older men, women, and teenagers being used during both World Wars to watch beaches, railroads, and factories for saboteurs.  Rather than see the DHS run roughshod over local law enforcement to improve security, I could see the governors instituting such a program of volunteer guards to be speed bumps and trip wires in the event of further attacks.

This story was more “The Third World War” than it was “Team Yankee“.  Sorry, but I’ve never been good at characters and dialogue, so I stuck with what I can do.  Like I said, I hope you enjoyed it.  It definitely got some really dark thoughts out of my head.

 

Update – Drang has some excellent thoughts on unorganized militia.

30 Days of Dickens – Day 27

Any man may be in good spirits and good temper when he’s well dressed. There an’t much credit in that. If I was very ragged and very jolly, then I should begin to feel I had gained a point, Mr Pinch. — Martin Chuzzlewit

My Take – It’s easy to be happy and optimistic when everything is going smoothly.  When the road is smooth and straight, you can see your goal from miles away.  When things are bad, it’s hard to see what’s right in front of you, much less down the road.  There will be times when everything hits you at once.  Finances, relationships, jobs, illness, and everything else that can self-destruct, will self-destruct.  You spend so much time ducking and weaving that you stop being able to look ahead.  But you must.  Take the time to figure out what’s wrong in your life, how you’re going to get through it, and what you want to happen after.  Having a plan and knowing that you’re following it will take a world of weight off your shoulders, and things won’t look quite so bad.

Today’s Earworm