Yeh, have I sinned against nature and my beloved wife’s aesthetic.
For you see, my brethren, I have consolidated two to three incomplete sewing kits in cheap, brittle plastic boxes into one container made of tin, a material that will outlive us all.
Not even a cookie tin, but a tin that previously sheltered the blessed cake of fruit, crafted by the monks of Nelson County and bathed in sweet, sweet corn liquor. Yes, even now, you can smell the barrel house when you open the lid.
Ah, but my transgression is great, and the sorrow I have brought upon my house is greater. How shall she be able to see all the colors of the thread without the semi-see-through lid that is held shut by a deteriorating plastic clip? How will she be able to keep the thread that is azure separate from the thread that is the color of spun gold?
And to add to it, I labeled it incorrectly, having used a length of duct tape and a marker I took from Her Ladyship’s own desk to write up on it “SEWING KIT” so that the uninitiated may know the contents of said tin of holding.
Oh, the tackiness, the horror! Oh, the trashiness, the low-rent, trailer park mentality that led me to do such a crime?
Oh, the shame of it! Oh, how shall I ever make this up to her?
What penance shall I do to atone for this crime? Shall I flagellate myself with the many skeins of yarn that lurk in the house after our son, the Young Prince, the last scion of her father’s house, stopped his fascination with knitting these many years ago? Or perhaps I could walk thrice around the house after she has scattered the floor with some of the 3,925,843,212 Lego pieces that are housed in our basement?
Look not upon this poor sinner, children. Know only that it is better to have needle and thread placed strategically throughout the house than to have it consolidated into one durable, clearly labeled vessel.
DaddyBear’s Den 
Anonymous
/ May 1, 2025I’m sure that Waterford most likely makes a crystal sewing kit. If not you could commission one to be created from them so that your loving bride may be equipped to peruse her sewing accessories without the strain of lifting a tin lid like a mere peasant.
At this point, can you actually say that you truly love her? Why is that pedestal that you’ve built for her so short in stature?
You have disgraced all men. Please kindly turn in your man card at the nearest publix house.
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daddybear71
/ May 2, 2025I shall search for a crystal casket to keep her needle and thread in. Thanks be to you for the protip
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MaddMedic
/ May 1, 2025You messed with your spouse’s sewing kit?
What next?
Move the sewing machine???
Dead man walking!!!
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daddybear71
/ May 2, 2025Ye, though I walk through the valley of death, I only fear my wife, for she monitors every move I make.
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Anonymous
/ May 1, 2025LOL, looks like mine, but then I don’t have a wife to get pissed at me for ‘consolidating’…
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Anonymous
/ May 2, 2025Verily I say unto thee, there be TWO transgressions, though the second be of trivial consequence being directly derived from the first!
(OK… enough olde tyme speak)
Transgression the First: As any fule kno, the ONLY allowable container for a sewing kit is a Royal Dank Butter Cookie tin.
Turn in your GenX card.
Transgression the Second: No label needed. See also: Transgression the First.
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daddybear71
/ May 2, 2025You have a point. The Gethsemene Farms tin was just handy, but I will endeavor to do better next time!
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Anonymous
/ May 3, 2025Oh, No, you didn’t. Don’t you know any better or is old age setting in? Why, why would you do this? Bored? If the urge strikes again get a bottle of beer, fix a drink and go sit out in the sun and contemplate life or your navel. But never mess with a woman’s sewing stuff.
I have a plastic box, for over 50 years, only for thread. And a tin for my pins and needles along with another for various items like seam rippers. All still in perfect condition. Nobody but me touches them.
Lordy, I thought I had heard it all but it’s nice to be rendered speechless now and then.
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