I really appreciate the White House sending this to me today.  I needed a catharsis.  As always, my comments are in italics.

President Obama spoke to service men and women at MacDill Air Force Base yesterday about the U.S. strategy to degrade and ultimately destroy ISIL — a terrorist organization that is killing innocent, unarmed civilians in both Iraq and Syria. ISIL, also known as ISIS or the Islamic State, is also responsible for the brutal murders of American journalists Jim Foley and Steven Sotloff.

Yep, nothing like using service-members as a backdrop.  I didn’t like it when Clinton did it, or Bush, but this administration must have a duty roster for who gets to be Photogenic Military Guy #37 this week.

Here are the key points the President made yesterday regarding ISIL and our strategy to defeat their forces:

1. ISIL is threatening America and our allies.

Our intelligence community has not yet detected specific plots from ISIL against our homeland, but they have repeatedly threatened our core interests, including our personnel, our embassies, our consulates, and our facilities in Iraq, Syria, and in the broader Middle East. “If left unchecked, they could pose a growing threat to the United States,” he said.

Yes, they’re making Internet videos of threats and beheadings, and have found a few useful idiots to take pictures of American landmarks.   Booga Booga.  But let’s be honest here.  I’ve seen true threats to America.  They usually come from real governments who have, you know, nuclear weapons and stuff.  These doofuses are, at best, as much of a threat as a jackal has to a bull elephant.   Annoying, maybe even able to inflict some damage, but not a threat. 

Oh, and if you’re looking to avenge the two Americans who were murdered by these trolls, how about we turn the tables on them and go all Carthage on their butts?  Nothing says “Don’t mess with us” like a graveyard full of the other side’s people and shattered cities.   Of course, that would require you admitting that Americans’ lives are worth more than the lives of cavedwellers and goatherds, so I won’t hold my breath.

2. The U.S. continues to conduct targeted airstrikes against ISIL.

The U.S. Air Force has conducted more than 160 airstrikes against ISIL, successfully protecting our personnel and facilities, killing ISIL fighters, and giving space for Iraqi and Kurdish forces to reclaim key territory. “They’ve helped our partners on the ground break ISIL sieges; helped rescue civilians cornered on a mountain; helped save the lives of thousands of innocent men, women and children,” the President said.

Yes, we’ve given the Iraqi’s space to reclaim territory they abandoned right after they dropped their rifles, left their artillery pieces, and took off their uniforms.  As allies, we’d have been better off if we enlisted the Brownie Scouts.  They at least know how to march.

3. American forces that have been deployed to Iraq do not and will not have a combat mission.

“As your Commander-in-Chief, I will not commit you, and the rest of our Armed Forces, to fighting another ground war in Iraq,” the President told servicemembers. Along with our airstrikes, U.S. forces will train, equip, advise, and assist local partners on the ground “so that they can secure their own countries’ futures.”

Just like our advisors in Vietnam didn’t have a combat role.  Tell that to Tom Davis, who died in Vietnam four years before the Tonkin Gulf incident.  Oh, and we spent the better part of a decade training and equipping those local ‘partners’, and look what we have to show for it.  Training the local yokels will accomplish about as much as setting the money and equipment it takes to do it on fire.

4. This is not and will not be America’s fight alone.

The U.S. will lead a broad coalition of countries who have a stake in this fight. France and the UK are already flying with us over Iraq, and other countries have committed to join this effort. Saudi Arabia has agreed to host American efforts to train and equip Syrian opposition forces. Australia and Canada are going to send military advisors to Iraq, while Germany is sending paratroopers to help offer training. Arab nations have agreed to strengthen their support for Iraq’s new government, a key ally in our strategy to defeat ISIL.

Ahahahahahahaahaha!  Wait, you’re serious?  Come on, Sparky, be honest.  Our allies, outside of the Anglosphere, have been as worthless as tits on a boar hog since about 1945.  The French and Italians couldn’t even sustain bombing in your unauthorized war in Libya without our help, and you can almost spit from their southern most points and hit Benghazi. 

Giving guns and basic combat training to the wogs in Iraq is going to do nothing but make us look foolish when we start noticing that some of our dead are shot with 5.56×45 instead of 7.26×39 in a couple of months.   The easiest way to equip ISIS in December is to equip the ‘moderate’ forces in the region in October.

International partners will help us cut off ISIL funding, gather intelligence, and prevent foreign fighters from entering — or leaving — the Middle East. And nearly 30 nations have joined American humanitarian relief to help civilians, including Sunni, Shia, Christian, Yezidi, or other religious minorities, that ISIL has driven from their homes.

International partners are the main source of ISIS funding, you dolt.  The biggest mistake Bush made on September 12, 2001, was to not cut off all relations with the kingdom of Saudi Arabia and declare a moratorium on trade with anyone who did trade with them.  And if you want to stop foreign fighters from getting into the Middle East, maybe you ought to be talking to the British and the French.   It appears that a lot of their civilized young men have decided to grow their beards out, hop a flight, and get their jihad on.  I guess you can ask RyanAir to stop offering cheap flights to Ankara, but then again, it’s only a couple of days drive from London to Damascus.

As for giving aid to true refugees, yeah, I can get behind that.  Just as long as they don’t do it in Arkansas.

5. Congress should provide the authorities and resources the U.S. military needs to succeed.

The President has called on Congress to support our military with the necessary resources to train and equip Syrian opposition fighters. As he has said, America’s leadership position is strongest when the President and Congress work together and show a united front.

Training and equipping the Syrian opposition is the wrong thing to do.  Let me make this clear:  Assad is going nowhere, and even if, by some miracle, he was deposed, whatever replaces him is going to hate our guts.  There is no benefit to the American people by getting involved.  Quit diddling around in other people’s wars.

“Sending our servicemembers into harm’s way is not a decision I ever take lightly,” the President said. “It is the hardest decision I make as President. Nothing else comes close.”

Actually, I’m not convinced that figuring out whether to use a 9 Iron or not on the 13th hole isn’t a bigger decision for you.  You obviously didn’t have to think too long before detailing 3000 servicemembers to spend Christmas in either West Africa or quarantine to make sure they don’t bring Ebola back with them.

But this strategy will require the best military force in the world:

Frankly, there just aren’t a lot of other folks who can perform in the same ways — in fact, there are none. And there are some things only we can do. There are some capabilities only we have. That’s because of you — your dedication, your skill, your work, your families supporting you, your training, your command structure. Our Armed Forces are unparalleled and unique. And so when we’ve got a big problem somewhere around the world, it falls on our shoulders. And sometimes that’s tough. But that’s what sets us apart. That’s why we’re America. That’s what the stars and stripes are all about.

“In an uncertain world full of breathtaking change, the one constant is American leadership.”

Actually, the only constant we’ve had in our military since January 2009 has been either politicized social experimentation or distractions from whatever it is you’ve been up to.  Guess which one this falls into?

And, because of the strength and dedication of America’s military, the President made clear that we will send an unmistakable message to ISIL:

Whether in Iraq or in Syria, these terrorists will learn the same thing that the leaders of al Qaeda already know: We mean what we say; our reach is long; if you threaten America, you will find no safe haven. We will find you eventually.

Tough talk. If only he had a track record of crying havoc and letting slip the dogs of war, instead of sniveling loudly and jerking our chain to back it up.