Snaps: [pointing to Anthony] Pop this guy!
Aldo: Boss! We can’t have a stiff in the house with company coming!
Snaps: You’re right. It ain’t proper.— Oscar
I take it as a sign of respect that someone puts on a pot of coffee or offers me a beer when I go to their home. I take it as an obligation that when I find out someone’s on their way over that I give the house a quick once-over. There seem to be more rules of hospitality here in the South than I remember out West or back home. What are your traditions on being both a guest and a host?
DaddyBear’s Den 
oldnfo
/ February 26, 2014I bring booze… or coffee depending… 🙂
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Professor Hale
/ February 26, 2014When a guest arrives, it is proper to greet them at the door and block their entry until they can force you out of the way. This shows that you respect their strength. Otherwise they need a search warrant to enter.
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daddybear71
/ February 28, 2014“Guest”
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auntiejl
/ February 26, 2014To be honest, it depends on who we’re expecting. If you’re close friends and you’ve been here more than twice, we consider you family. Just walk on in. You don’t have to knock, especially if I know you’re coming. Will I try to make sure the house doesn’t look like we’ve lived as cavemen for the last week (even if we have)? Yes. Are you hungry? Thirsty? Fridge is there. Pantry’s over there. Please, help yourself. My good friend Mitzy, who comes over to help clean my house every week, knows that she can just walk in. If she’s hungry and there’s leftovers, she knows she can have some. If she’s thirsty, she knows where the big ol’ plastic tumblers are and the basket with the Crystal Light in it. I love that she’s that comfortable with us, with being here in our home.
If you’ve not been here before, I will actually go to more effort. We got found by the Mormon missionaries awhile back. We’re not Mormon, and won’t ever convert, but I choose to be nice to them regardless. We had them over last weekend to sit and discuss our faiths, to have an honest and respectful conversation. They’ve been here a couple times before, and we’ve mostly just chatted. Since I knew we would have these gentlemen here for a couple of hours, I had filled water glasses in the living room, along with a tray of cookies, before they arrived. They said they’d never had anyone offer them refreshments before.
When we visit somewhere (depending on where it is), we try to bring some kind of host/hostess gift, even if it’s just some homemade fudge that I whipped up real fast before we left home.
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daddybear71
/ February 26, 2014I’ve heard that called “Refrigerator Rights”. It means you’ve become close enough you’re allowed to help yourself.
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auntiejl
/ February 26, 2014Never heard it put that way before, but yeah…and we tend to be pretty generous about granting them. It’s partly who we are, and it’s partly because we want Hubby’s youth group kids to feel at home here. We’ve always had an open-door policy for our big kids.
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Christina LMT
/ February 27, 2014If I’m visiting someone for the first time, I always bring a “host(ess)” gift. I mean, I’m GERMAN. We would bring flowers to my Oma whenever she had us over for Sunday dinner. Freesias, her favorite. It’s just courteous, as is not leaving a mess, etc.
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daddybear71
/ February 28, 2014That was something I learned in high school German. It went a long way when visiting military families where the wife was German later in life.
Speaking of courteous, I have a German language question, Christina. Is the use of fraulein depricated nowadays? Girlie Bear’s German teacher says that it’s not used anymore because it’s seen as sexist. My everyday German usage is kind of dated, but I was always told to use Fraulein until about age 25 or until there’s a ring on her finger.
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Lazy Bike Commuter
/ February 28, 2014The first time I went to a party at Suburban Ninja’s house (for her sister’s college graduation), I made a big thing of Rotel dip and brought that and a bag or two of tortilla chips. I got weird looks from her parents, almost acting offended that I thought they wouldn’t feed us, but I guess I just always assume that when there’s a party, you bring food.
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Christina LMT
/ February 28, 2014LBC, I’m with you. OF COURSE you bring something with you to a party (either to eat or drink). Anything else is uncivilized. 😀
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daddybear71
/ February 28, 2014I will usually bring either food or drink unless specifically told not to by the hostess. Not the host, the hostess. Yes, that’s sexist. Yes, it’s accurate.
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Lazy Bike Commuter
/ February 28, 2014It’s that Kentucky-to-Ohio culture shock. Them Yankees got weird notions.
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