I somehow ended up on a mailing list for White House…. communications.  I’m sure it’s something I’ve done, because no-one I know would be malicious enough to to that to me.

Anyway, it’s quite refreshing to receive hand-crafted, artisanal partisan politics direct to my inbox every few days.

Here’s the latest missive from 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.  My responses are in italics.

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Dan Pfeiffer, The White House

Hello —

Hi Dan, how’s it going?  Having a good week?  We’re doing fine here in Kentucky.  I’m hard at work making money so that you and yours can have a good life.

Right now, Congress has two jobs: to pass a budget that invests in the middle class and to pay the bills it has already incurred.

Actually, Congress has quite a few jobs, but I get your point.  The Congress, specifically the Senate, does indeed need to pass a budget.  This task hasn’t been done since April 29, 2009.  To put that in perspective, my youngest son had just turned 1 then, and he’s in kindergarten now.

But instead of doing their jobs, a few reckless Republicans in Congress are so obsessed with refighting old political battles over Obamacare that they’re threatening to shut down the government and stop paying the country’s bills.

Pot, meet kettle.  You all have some big brass ones for calling someone else out for playing politics.  And it wasn’t a ‘few reckless Republicans’.  The vote in the House was 230 to 189.  Let me guess, those evil reckless Republicans were holding the families of those who were demurring on defunding Obamacare hostage until after the vote.

On Friday, these House Republicans voted to shut down the government unless the Senate and the President agree to defund Obamacare. This week, instead of playing those games, the Senate is set to send a simple budget resolution back to the House — one that keeps the government open for a few months while leaders continue to work on a budget that creates jobs and cuts the deficit in a balanced way. That’s a reasonable solution.

How about we play another game?  This one in which Harry Reid and Barack Obama admit that their ‘Affordable Care Act’ is making health insurance unaffordable, forcing people out of their insurance plans, either to pay more for less coverage or into having none at all, and is so horrendous that Congress has exempted itself and its employees from having to deal with it.

But some Republicans still care more about scoring political points on Obamacare than keeping the government open and our economy moving forward.

If the President doesn’t want someone scoring political points in the budget process, then why is he making speeches to his adoring fans about those evil people on Capitol Hill who want to stop the Obamacare trainwreck?  If he cares so much about keeping the government going, then why doesn’t he let Obamacare die on the vine?  Of course, then he might need a doctor himself, because his ego is so badly bruised now that one more blow might be fatal to the poor thing.

This kind of up-to-the-final-hour brinksmanship is beyond irresponsible, and it could reverse the hard-earned economic progress we’ve made by creating another crisis. Unfortunately, we’ve watched them run this play before, and we know what it looks like. Two years ago, these Republicans held the economy hostage, and as a result our credit rating was downgraded, the stock market plummeted 17 percent, consumer confidence dropped like a rock, and businesses stopped hiring.

Here’s a hint:  If you owe creditors 100+% of your yearly income, then your credit rating is going to go down, especially if your rate of spending is going up.  You all, and by that I mean the last three or so administrations, have been spending money like it was water, and you’re blaming the people who want to tighten the tap a bit for your credit rating?

And those of us who want the President to listen to the American people and find a better way aren’t the ones with the gun against the nation’s temple.  That person sits in the Oval Office.

That’s why it’s time for GOP lawmakers to pass a simple budget resolution that doesn’t defund Obamacare and move on.

That’s why it’s time for Harry Reid and President Obama to get on with their lives and admit they were wrong when they passed Obamacare in the first place.

We need your help to spread the word so that Americans know what’s going on, so forward this message to your friends and family.

Done and done.

In the five years since the financial crisis began, the American people have pushed the economy forward. Over the past 42 months, businesses have added 7.5 million jobs. American manufacturing is growing again, and the auto industry is back. We’ve reformed Wall Street so that no company is ever again too big to fail and created the toughest consumer financial protections this nation has ever seen. We’ve cut our deficit by more than half, made the tax code more progressive, and reformed our health care system.

What does this have to do with the subject at hand?  OK, I’ll play:  Businesses are adding part-time McJobs, and the labor pool participation rate is the lowest it’s been in my lifetime.  That means that a huge number of people have just plain given up.  The auto industry, outside of Ford, is a zombie that needed to be put down in 2009, but was given a huge transfusion of cash just before it went into the toilet.  Of course, the UAW is sitting pretty, so I guess you can call that a win for someone.  Wall Street is more stratified and “too big to fail” than it was before the crisis.  The deficit was cut because you all couldn’t find a way to do the right thing last year, so automatic across-the-board cuts went into effect. And your ‘reform’ of the health care system means that more people are going to be either on Medicaid or without insurance entirely.

Today, there is record demand for American products abroad, and our tech companies are booming. The housing market is coming back — sales of existing homes are up by double digits and new foreclosures are down to the lowest levels since the start of 2006.

Again, how is this relevant to the subject of your email?  Oh wait, I understand. If you can’t make a point using facts and figures, baffle them with bullshit.  Got it.

I guess we’re out of the rut we were in, because Google and Microsoft employ millions of American workers.  Let’s face it, if you aren’t one of the educational, social, or political elite, the Obama ‘recovery’ isn’t doing much for you.  You eloi up on the mountaintop have no idea how the rest of us are having to work tooth and nail to keep the wheels on while you enjoy the party.  That is, until our jobs are sent overseas by someone who contributed to your presidential library fund or reelection campaign.

You know, you probably don’t want to trumpet the housing market too loudly.  Just because you’ve hit bottom, where people are willing to buy up properties with depressed values, isn’t a good thing unless you can find a way to stop bouncing along the bottom.  Plus, we all knew that eventually the banks would run out of mortgages to foreclose on.  It’s not time to count coup just because you were able to survive long enough to see us find the bottom of the mineshaft.

We need to keep building momentum. So we’re asking Congress to join the President in creating a better bargain for the middle class, and give up on manufacturing a new political crisis. For that to happen, reasonable Congressional Republicans have to stand up to a few extreme members of their party for the good of the country and our economy.

Want to help the middle class?  Then get out of our way.  The middle class was finding it’s own solutions to the ‘healthcare crisis’ just fine before you all came along and peed in the punchbowl.  We either had the insurance we wanted or had a clear path to finding it.  With the way things are going now, we’re going to be lucky to get seen at the free clinic in a couple of weeks the next time one of the kids gets sick.

From the day he took office, President Obama has been open to any good idea when it comes to the budget, as long as supporting middle-class families remains our North Star. Republicans won’t extract concessions over the full faith and credit of the United States.

Here’s a good idea:  Propose a budget and get your own party to vote for it.  Cut out the ideological crusading, do your homework, and do your bloody job.  I don’t pay you all to try to make this country into your vision of a first world shithole. 

Will you help spread the word? Share this message so that people know what’s about to happen to the economy if Congress doesn’t act.

Again, done and done.  I’m doing my best to tell everyone I know just what will happen to our economy if that collection of cronyism and corporate carve-outs is allowed to come into force.

Thanks,

No, Dan, thank you.  Have a good one.

Dan

Dan Pfeiffer
Senior Advisor
The White House