- From the “Schadenfreude” Department – A man in Massachusetts was found with his head stuck under the garage door of the business he was attempting to rob. Oh, how sad that he should be caught in a rather painful and embarrassing manner. I certainly hope that the counselors at the prison are able to help him work through the trauma. But an evil little part of me also hopes that the bruise is permanent so he’ll always be known as the man with the door hickey.
- From the “Look in the Mirror” Department – Rahm Emanuel, late of the Obama White House and current mayor of Chicago, took to the airwaves to ask “Who raised you?” of the persons responsible for the death of a little girl who was caught in the crossfire of gang violence in the city. Mr. Mayor, might I suggest that the animals who did this were raised by the destroyed community that you and your ilk have been nurturing for the past two generations? I think that if you looked at the failed policies and programs of your side of the equation rather carefully, you would see millions of people who have no respect for human life staring back at you and that the wheels of your political machine are liberally greased with the blood of the innocent.
- From the “Good Start” Department – Several members of the TSA at Newark Airport were fired recently when surveillance cameras caught them sleeping in front of baggage screening monitors. “Who watches the watchers?” indeed. Now if we can just get the rest of the thieves, malingerers, and molesters out of the TSA, and let the five or six that would be left do something useful, we’ll be ahead of the game.
- From the “Hint, Hint” Department – A man in India is being treated for splitting headaches that come on when he watches pornography. Apparently he is not afflicted during other sexual circumstances, but watching smut appears to set them off. Doctors have prescribed prophylactic ibuprofen and acetaminophen for his problem, which seems to help. Of course, he could just stop looking at porn, but I’m told that’s just crazy talk.
- From the “Surprise, Surprise, Surprise” Department – The Justice Department has announced that it will not be pursuing charges against Attorney General Eric Holder after the House of Representatives found him in contempt for not producing documents connected to the Fast and Furious gun running scandal. I don’t think anyone is shocked by this. This leaves Congress with a few options: They can bring in a special prosecutor, they can impeach the Attorney General, or they can go to court to try to get the Judicial Branch involved. That last one seems to be their preferred strategy at the moment. I believe they have another weapon: the purse strings. The House has to pass any budget for the Justice Department, and if they wanted to, they could cut it off. Yes, federal law enforcement would grind to a halt, but something tells me that starving the beast would bring it to its knees pretty quick. I look forward to months of chest beating, prick waving, grandstanding, and chicken playing before this is somehow resolved. My guess is that it will take a change in administration before anything happens, and Obama can always pull a Gerry Ford and issue blanket pardons while Michelle is packing in January.
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News Roundup
Posted by daddybear71 on June 29, 2012
https://daddybearsden.com/2012/06/29/news-roundup-132/
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