Yeah, I’m finally in the mood.  Not the Christmas mood, just a mood.

Jingle bells, UNIX smells
Windows laid an egg
The mainframe it just vapor locked
But the VAX is A-OK!

I’m dreaming of a white laptop
Just like Jobs used to sell
With a one button mouse
It costs as much as a house
But it goes with black turtlenecks so well!

The users called me
The network is down
They can’t surf their pr0n
The network is down
The tech is on his way
The network is down
Email jokes can’t be sent!
The network is down
Network is down
Network is down

Silent NOC
Happy NOC
No alerts
No drama
Reading a novel
And eating take-out
Hoping my shift
is quiet no doubt
Keep my board clea–ar
Ke-ep my board so clear

Just see those servers crashing
And hard drives thrashing
Oh joy!
This is a great profession
for someone with a pain obsession
Oh boy!