While watching Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, Irish Woman had the following thought:

The reason that Mrs. Claus is always urging Santa to eat is so that she can fatten him up on carbs and high-fat foods.  Her hopes are probably that he’ll take off in that sleigh, and under the stress of the Christmas rush, he’ll have a stroke and crash.  That way she can inherit the entire North Pole  How much do you want to bet she has a double indemnity life insurance policy on the fat man?  

Yes, it’s no mystery why I love her so much.  She’s my soul mate.