- From the “Get A Rope” Department – An on-line gamer was recently ‘swatted’ while broadcasting from his home. Swatting is the practice by which a false police report is called in, causing the police to send armed people to storm the home or business of the victim. In this instance, a report of a murder and threats to kill police were called in, and the hijinks were visible to anyone who was watching the victim’s video stream. Nothing says family entertainment like sending people with rifles to mess with a gamer’s flow. Words like “attempted murder” came to mind as I read this.
- From the “Sins of the Mother” Department – A four-year-old boy was kicked out of his school after his mother complained on-line about the school not notifying her about picture day. Apparently the mother had agreed to not “sow discord” somewhere in the avalanche of paperwork that parents sign at the beginning of the school year, and she called into question the intelligence of the school’s personnel in her post. You know, you can sow more than discord if you’re going to get kicked out anyway. Just saying.
- From the “Corinthian Leather” Department – A woman in London was surprised when she opened the trunk of her new car to discover an 8 foot boa constrictor. The former owner claims that he lost the reptile, but had searched the car thoroughly. He says that the new owner can trust in him that no other large reptiles are loose in the car. The snake in question appears to be unharmed, and will be driving against the Stig on the next season of Top Gear.
- From the “Cold Feet” Department – A man in Connecticut gets the DaddyBear’s Den Golden Schwanz Award for 2014 after having his father tell his British fiance that he had committed suicide. It seems that the young man didn’t have the guts to break up with the young lady, and figured it was easier to fake his own death rather than make that call. Now, I’ve been in some relationships that I desperately wanted to get out of, but I’ve never been so desperate that I’ve asked someone to tell the other party that I took my own life.
- From the “Criminal Mastermind” Department – Geologists from the outside world are being allowed to investigate and study a semi-dormant volcano on the Chinese / North Korean border. Reports are that the volcano is rumbling a bit, but that might be linked to the secret submarine and missile launch base in the mountain’s crater. Scientists have discovered a network of underground tunnels, where the DPRK’s leadership have stashed super weapons and caches of stolen gold bullion. Kim Jong Un, leader of the Hermit Kingdom, deflected questions about the mountain as he sat on his throne, stroking a white long-haired cat and squinting through his monocle. No word yet on the contents of the massive chamber that was broken into during earlier excavations or the status of the team that found it, although legends of the soul of Kim Il Sung wandering the side of the mountain persist.
- From the “Miffed Terrier” Department – President Emeritus Obama, taking a break from his summer holiday, has jetted off to Estonia to try to bolster relations with NATO members who share a border with Russia. Mr. Obama promised to defend Estonia and other small European countries, just as soon as they complete new links-style courses for ‘maneuvers’. In related news, Vice President Biden has been sighted in the Balkans reassuring confused Serb and Croat peasants that the United States will stand by its commitment to NATO.
- From the “All Rights Are Important Rights” Department – A black politician was arrested recently after police tried to stop him for putting leaflets on cars during a political rally. The leaflets are reported to have detailed civil rights information, and the officers arrested the man after he asked them to tell him what law he was breaking after they objected to his activity. Now, I’m sure that this gentleman and I would not see eye to eye on a lot of issues, but the fact that an agent of the state decided that defying orders to stop a legal and constitutionally protected activity was grounds to handcuff someone and drive them around town before taking them to jail raises my hackles. Things like this should not happen in the United States, and we owe it to ourselves and every other citizen to stand up and fight when they do. I hope he sues the police department over this, and if he needs donations to fund such a suit, he’ll get a bit of money from me.
- From the “Bad Things” Department – A Chicago police commander has been charged after it was alleged that he put the barrel of his sidearm into the mouth of a suspect and held an electric stun gun against the man’s genitals. It’s a good sign that prosecutors and police leadership in Chicago are letting this see the light of day. Maybe there’s some progress being made after all.
News Roundup
Posted by daddybear71 on September 4, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/09/04/news-roundup-224/
Movie Quotes – Day 247
You can get further with a kind word and a gun than you can with just a kind word. — The Untouchables
You can learn every martial art known to man. You can work out until you resemble a side of beef. You can carry every doo-dad and blade you want. But at more than bad-breath distances, nothing beats a gun for self defense. If a 97 year old grandmother, who weighs, maybe, a buck-oh-five soaking wet and holding a brick, can drive off an attacker with a couple of pounds of metal and a few grams of gunpowder, then the utility of a firearm wielded by the weaker against the stronger cannot be doubted.
Posted by daddybear71 on September 4, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/09/04/movie-quotes-day-247/
Thoughts on the Day
- It is a rather foolish thing to talk to your daughter about doing foolish things and then fall out of a tree while clearing away dead wood.
- No worries. I caught myself with my sternum and my knee.
- Wives get really inquisitive when you walk around holding your chest.
- Seriously, honey, it’s just a bruise.
- It is amazing how much mirth my loving wife can find in my method of injury.
- My youngest son has been walking around, speaking with an upper class British accent for two days. I’m not sure if it’s cute or annoying.
- There are few things better than leftovers from a cookout.
- Apparently Google Earth drove down my street today. Now, everyone on the planet will know that I need to mow my lawn.
Posted by daddybear71 on September 3, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/09/03/thoughts-on-the-day-254/
Movie Quotes – Day 246
I don’t know if HAL is homicidal, suicidal, neurotic, psychotic, or just plain broken. — 2010
Technology is either a wonderful blessing or a punishment from on high. A tiny hand-held computer with a radio and camera attached to it is either a super convenient way to share photographs of yourself and your adventures with friends, or a really easy way to have your breasticles splashed across the Internet for all to see. (No, I haven’t looked. When the young starlets start to look more and more like your teenage daughter, you stop looking.)
A car with more computing power than a space shuttle makes driving easier, more efficient, and almost a joy to drive. Or, it can break your pocketbook and destroy your mind as you try to troubleshoot what should be a simple problem. Did I ever mention how much I hate Chrysler engineers? They took the simple thing we used to call a headlight switch and replaced it with a circuit board that cost $80 to replace.
No matter what, you have to remember that a computer is not alive, has no feelings, and really isn’t out to get you. Of course, the counter argument is that they always seem to break or have a seizure when you’re trying to meet a deadline, get some sleep, or don’t have the money to fix or replace them.
Posted by daddybear71 on September 3, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/09/03/movie-quotes-day-246/
Growing Up Under My Roof
This is sort of PSA for young people.
The following are your rights while living under my roof:
- You have the right to know that you are loved. This may mean that you get a hug after an ass chewing.
- You have the right to be safe in my home and to expect me to protect you. This may mean that on occasion you will be growled at for doing things that are unsafe.
- You have the right to clean, serviceable clothing. This may require some work on your part once you achieve a certain age.
- You have the right to safe, nutritious food. This will include the occasional treat. Emphasis on occasional.
- You have the right to an education, both in and out of school.
- You have the right to expect that I will provide for your healthcare, within reason.
- You have the right to clean your body on at least a daily basis. But please remember that we only have one bathroom in the house.
- You have the right to communicate with your loved ones that do not live in my home. Friends and schoolmates do not count, and non-emergency phone calls from non-family after 9 PM may invoke the nuclear option.
The following things are not rights while living under my roof:
- Entertainment at the cost of the time, energy, and funds of other members of the household. Learn to entertain yourself.
- Living an easy life. You will have daily, weekly, and on-demand chores. I may or may not pay you for certain things, depending on whether they go above and beyond.
- Transportation for non-educational or non-healthcare related activities. I will, however, provide you with Leather Personnel Carriers so that you may walk anywhere you wish to go.
- A paying job. Schoolwork and your chores come first.
- Cell phones, laptops, tablets, television, and music played at 11 on the volume dial. I don’t care what year this is, and you will continue to draw breath if these things are not part of your daily life.
Here are some extraneous rules:
- No smoking, no drinking, no other intoxicants, no overnight guests from your dating pool. Also, no new holes in your body or permanent marks upon your skin.
- Your hair will be clean, neat, and the same color it was when it came out of your scalp.
- You will not go to school or out in public looking like Joe Shit the Rag Man.
- “It’s not fair.” or “I’m frustrated” mean nothing to me.
- My word and the word of Irish Woman is the final word on any subject under our roof. If one of us tells you to do something, do it. Complain afterward if you must, but doing as you’re told first will help you in your quest to prevent further ‘injustice’.
- Seriously, when one of us tells you to jump, you better say “How high?” after you’re a foot in the air.
- You are not an adult until you live independent from any outside support. Until such time, you will be treated at an age appropriate level, but not as an adult.
- Don’t try to bribe me, either with affection or especially good behavior. If you need something, tell me about it and why it’s important. If you want something, ask for it and accept my decision.
- I reserve the right to change rules as I see fit. You will be informed of these changes, but their enforcement will begin immediately after I feel you’ve had enough time to conform to them.
- There are two reasons for failure: lack of talent and lack of effort. If you fail because, no matter how hard you tried, you just couldn’t do something, I will accept that and work with you to either develop your talents or find something more suited to you. If you fail because you didn’t put forth the effort, may God have mercy on your soul.
- In relation to this, when you need help, ask for it. Two days before report cards come out is not the day to tell me that a certain class is kicking your ass.
- You should never fear me, but you should fear my displeasure.
Posted by daddybear71 on September 3, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/09/03/growing-up-under-my-roof/
Musings
- I’m not known for my people skills, but when I offer to take more than my fair share of a workload, I get a little grumpy when someone tells me I’m making things difficult for others.
- When the high point of your day is a surprise random drug screening at work, that might just be a sign that you should have pulled the covers over your head and gone back to sleep.
- It’s a hard lesson for a young woman, but making Girlie Bear pay to replace the tablet computer she destroyed after owning it for THREE DAYS will hopefully teach her to take better care of her things.
- Whoever taught Boo to sing songs from “Frozen”, I am going to hunt you down and stake you out for the wombats to nibble upon.
- If you’re such a troll that you make a good woman, who is as tough as nails and as kind as they come, decide that her hobby just isn’t worth the effort anymore, then you deserve whatever fate befalls you.
- If you have to be told to not to use company computers and networks to seek out leaked photographs of young, possibly under-age, starlets, then maybe you shouldn’t be allowed to use company computers and networks at all.
- If you want to debate whether or not Americans have the right to be outraged when they see two of their fellow citizens beheaded on the Internet, then don’t come crying to me in indignation when someone finally finds something that you value to violate.
- Phase II of the back yard hold out structure, also known as the tree/play house, is complete. The frame is up, and all I need to do now is make more money so I can put the sides and roof on.
- It’s good to work with people who understand that suggestions are just suggestions, and who don’t get emotional when you, after thoughtful consideration, decide to do something different.
Posted by daddybear71 on September 2, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/09/02/musings-75/
Movie Quotes – Day 245
It’s what people know about themselves inside that makes ’em afraid. — High Plains Drifter
In most cases, you create your own boogiemen. The fear of the unknown is nothing compared with the fear of what you use to fill that unknown. When you don’t know the intentions of an opponent, you fill them with the worst of your intentions. Perhaps that’s why so many ‘non-violent’ people ascribe the most heinous of depictions to the rest of us, or perhaps it’s why they sometimes suggest the most violent ways to deal with us.
Posted by daddybear71 on September 2, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/09/02/movie-quotes-day-245/
Repost – A Grim Anniversary
Today is the 10th anniversary of the terrorist attack at Beslan. Right now, relations with Russia aren’t very good, but I think we should pause to remember that the fanatics that want to kill us also lash out at other great powers.
————-
Here in the U.S., we are preparing for the anniversary of the September 11th attacks. But we are not alone in remembering savagery against innocents this week. In Russia, families are remembering the hundreds who died at Beslan.
C.J. Chivers over at Esquire did an excellent write-up of the attack back in 2006. It goes beyond the dry facts to show the small, heroic acts by ordinary people that saved lives. Every person who thinks about personal security and the lengths that barbarians will go to in order to incite terror should read it.
As a parent, I cannot imagine the shock and anguish of knowing that no matter what you did, your children were probably going to die. I also dread the thought that our schools are just as wide open and unprotected.
For my friends in Russia, I remember the innocents of Beslan. They were not soldiers, they were not politicians, they were school-children, parents, and teachers. I hope that your leaders have learned from the experience, and I hope that my leaders at least think about the possibility of something similar happening here.
Posted by daddybear71 on September 1, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/09/01/repost-a-grim-anniversary/
Today’s Earworm
Posted by daddybear71 on September 1, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/09/01/todays-earworm-547/
Movie Quotes – Day 244
I shall never understand the weird process by which a body with a voice suddenly fancies itself as a mind. — All About Eve
Just because you can express an opinion doesn’t mean that you will be taken seriously. In order to be more than background noise, you must know what you’re talking about. Learn about your subject, respect the informed opinions of others, and articulate your knowledge and experience in a way that others can understand and respect.
Posted by daddybear71 on September 1, 2014
https://daddybearsden.com/2014/09/01/movie-quotes-day-244/
DaddyBear
DaddyBear’s Den 