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Attention Kentucky People!

Winter is indeed upon us, and the white death from the sky is making your roads…. interesting to drive on.  Please remember these things as you get in your go-go-mobile in the next few days:

  • You are not any of the following people:
    • Jeff Gordon
    • Dale Earnhardt, Junior or Senior
    • Bo Duke
    • Luke Duke
    • Daisy Duke
  • Your SUV is not a snowmobile
  • Neither is your motorcycle
  • When the road is dry, that means you can go at speeds approaching the speed limit
  • When the road is wet, white, or shiny, that means you should slow the heck down.
  • I don’t care if your car was built like a tank by Swedish craftsmen.  It’s still sucks on snow and you don’t know how to drive it.
  • Pedestrians, ambulances, fire trucks, nuns, puppies, unicorns, and snow plows still have the right of way.
  • Salt does precisely diddly over squat below a certain temperature.  Guess how cold it’s going to get tonight?

Paying heed to these simple facts will keep your car out of the ditch and my foot out of your ass.  In closing, I hope you stay safe, stay warm, and stay home.

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5 Comments

  1. Or just do like me and don’t leave for work until 1:00 in the afternoon. (disclaimer: I had permission from my boss, do not attempt except in the correct circumstances)

  2. Roy

     /  December 27, 2012

    Well, DaddyBear, that was a waste of time. I live here too and I can tell you that even at high noon on the 4th of July, they have a hard time keeping the shiny side up. The consolation is that all those so-called “experts” from the great white north are not any better.

    • You have a point. I grew up in the land of snow, and for the first month or so, everyone drove like an idiot.

  3. Stay safe my friend…

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